Scottish League 2
Saturday 2 March 2024
Played at New Douglas Park (Hamilton Academical)
Ground Tick #475
We mooched on out to Clyde's groundshare at New Douglas Park, home of Hamilton Academical. For my 475th ground tick. Even with that win, Clyde are rock bottom. Staring relegation to the Lowland League in the fizzog.
But, it weren't always like this. In 1966/67, Clyde finished third in the Scottish top flight. Third behind Champions, Celtic. With Rangers in second. In that year, third place in Scotland would normally qualify for the Inter Cities Fairs Cup - the forerunner of the UEFA Cup and the Europa League.
But, with a nod towards its origins, the Fairs Cup only allowed one club from any one city to enter. Absurd. But that was it - one city, one club.
So. With Rangers from Glasgow already qualified. No additional Glasgow club could qualify. And Clyde were told they'd have to stay Haggis Side.
In those days, Clyde played at Shawfield Stadium. And, someone in the Bully Wee Carrier Bag Firm Back Office realised that Shawfield Stadium was in the Shawfield District of the Town of Rutherglen, in South Lanarkshire.
And a Telegram was fired off to UEFA HQ. Sharpish.
“Dear UEFA. Further to you banning us from the Fairs Cup. Because Rangers are from Glasgow. And it's One City One Club. We are pleased to inform you Clyde FC are Nae Frae Glasgae. We are frae RUTHERGLEN. We look forward to hearing from you who we're playing in the First Round.”
Well. That knocked the Fairs Cup Committee at UEFA bandy. Until, that is the events of 26 March 1964 were uncovered in the UEFA archives. When Celtic had beaten Clyde two zip.
That prompted the following response Telegram from UEFA.
“Dear Clyde FC. Thanks for your Telegram claiming you're Nae Frae Glasgae. And asking to be accepted into the Fairs Cup. May we just ask. If you're from Rutherglen. How the fuck did you manage to get to the Final of THE GLASGOW CUP three years ago. And get dicked off Celtic. Surely you'd have been in The Rutherglen Cup. You're not going to be in the Fairs Cup. Stop fucking about.”
And so, with a bit of poetic license, that is the bizarre story of the claims and counter claims around Clyde NOT qualifying for Europe despite a successful league campaign.
Here's a thought I'd never expected to think.
“No. No. No. This bar has a Tap Takeover by The Kernel Brewery tonight. What a fucking disaster…”
We had trekked Deep Sooooth to;
Koelschip Yard
686-688 Pollokshaws Rd, Glasgow G41 2QB
A great oasis of a beer place. A wonderful sixteen on. But, we'd trekked down the Pollokshaws Road in search of magnificent Scottish Craft Beers. And we'd ended up in For The Night Bermondsey!!!
Did we recover? Yes. We fucking recovered.
Simple Things Fermentations (Glasgow), Collab with McColl's Brewery (Co Durham), ESBeet, Extra Special Bitter with Beetroot on Keg at 6.2%
I asked to taste that before chucking in. Essentially, I don't like Beetroot. Maybe it just gave a bit of ooommmppphhh to the underpinning sweetness. Chevalier, Crystal, Aromatic and Black grains. Goldings hops from Kent. All delivering a nice, sweet but powerful Scottish Bitter.
Black Isle Brewery, Red Kite, Red Ale on Nitro at 4.2%
Looks the ticket, don't it? Worked very well on Nitro. I've seen a few of these John Smiths Busters recently. With mixed results. This was a Belter. A little Hazelnut. Not so sweet. And the hops did kick in. Maris Otter pale and crystal malts. Challenger hops with the late addition of Styrian Goldings.
Overtone Brewing Co (Glasgow), Boogie Nights, Passionfruit, Lime & Vanilla Sour on Keg at 7%
All trying to do too much I felt. But, nice. In an alcopop way.
I really enjoyed the game out at New Douglas Park. One of the function rooms turned over to the Happy Days Bar. With Tennents in the correct glass at four quid. Use yer Credit Card so you don't get lumbered with Jock Fivers.
We walked out into the unreserved seated stand and picked a spot which we thought would be up in the hills. Only to be quickly surrounded by Clyde's most vociferous fans. The fucking swearing was fucking world class.
Swear down - I have NEVER heard so long, and so many, sentences ending with PRICK in my life you PRICK.
And a great two Jordan Allan the Prick goals in three minutes for a comeback win for the Bully Wee.
The Pie of the Month was NOT Steak & Black Pudding you Prick.
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