Stick To Cheating At Cricket, Mate

Sheffield United 3 v Fulham 3 

Premier League 

Saturday 30 March 2024 

SUFC 2023/24 Game #54 

Of all the fucking things I didn't expect to have to do this week, it was to bollock Stuart Broad on Twitter. That'll be the Stuart Broad who has taken 604 Test Match wickets for England. The few of you who have read my Blogs from Cricket will know how much I love Broad. Look, I change my mind, but I sometimes say he's my favourite cricketer. He's retired now. He's born in Nottingham. And he supports Nottingham Forest.

Broad was reacting to some comments made by Gary Neville. Neville had suggested Brian Clough wouldn't have been a fan of Forest’s overspending rule breaking. Broad disagreed, countering that the rule breaking showed the ambition Clough would have loved. Fuck Sake.

Then to dig his point in half way down the track, he overstepped, with a blatant wide (of the mark) comment. Contrasting the ambitious rule breaking model, with what he called “The Sheffield United model”. I repeat Fuck Sake.

There's not supposed to be a Nottingham Forest model. There's not supposed to be a Sheffield United model. There's supposed to be a Premier League Club model. The fact that there are such different models illustrates the failure of the Premier League. 

By the way, that overspending, rule breaking model, puts the ambitious club just outside the relegation line and only seven points ahead of the named club with a different model having played a game more. Fuck Thrice Sake.

“The Sheffield United model….”

The knife edge-iness of the Premier League again in evidence against Fulham. By staying in the game well into the second half, we were able to turn up the confidence dial a bit for a change. Once we went ahead. And ahead again, that dial in (recently) uncharted territory. 

Clever by Wilder. And disciplined by McBurnie & BBD. You can't use them both as target men. So, Ben has to remember to hug out wide. And McBurnie has to remember to remember that. 

At “four one”. Jeez. Send a message. Send it to Broad. Model that Mate. But. You know. It most certainly didn't finish 4-1. And Broad has another data point for his sophisticated model.

Oh. And. Offside is Offside. Very occasionally subjective because of interference and/or phase reset. But, mainly objective and factual. Back to Three One.

Offside is Offside.

Refs aren't Bent.

Bianca Road Brew Co (Southwark), Collab with Varvar Brew (Kyiv, Ukraine), in support of Women Fight For Ukraine, Dyvo, Wheat Beer on Keg at 5%

Uiltje Brewing Co (Haarlem, Netherlands), Bird Of Prey, IPA on Keg at 5.8%

Citra, Chinook and Mosaic Hops.

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Ooohhh - Self Tilting Stillage

Fulham 3 v Sheffield United 1 

Premier League 

Saturday 7 October 2023 

SUFC 2023/24 Game #15 

Sheffield United Community Foundation B 0 v Grimsby Town Sports & Education Trust A 2 

Community & Education Football Alliance League, North East Central 1 

Wednesday 4 October 2023 

Played at Handsworth 

SUFC 2023/24 Game #14 

Hallam 2 v Frickley Athletic 0 

Northern Counties East League, Premier 

Tuesday 3 October 2023 

West Ham United 2 v Sheffield United 0 

Premier League 

Saturday 30 September 2023 

SUFC 2023/24 Game #13 

It may come as a surprise to you. But, there is little fucking fun to be had in being a Sheffield United Blogger at the mo'. I'm sorry, there's every chance these - digest of games - style Blogs become the norm for a bit. So here goes. Going to be a bit scattergun this 'un.

Here's the first advantage I have over other SUFC Content Providers. I can just say - fuck it, I'm a Beer Blogger.

There was Cask Ale on sale in the ground at BOTH West Ham and Fulham.

At West Ham, it was dispensed from this marvellous example of spring loaded self-tilting stillage. 

St Austell Brewery, Proper Job, Gravity at 4.5%

At Fulham, the tap was facing the punters rather than the servers. This meant the exact nature of the stillage was hidden from the Carrier Bag Firm. 

Brakspear Brewing Co, Gravity, Session Bitter at 3.4%

That was a London busting £4.90 a pint before half two. And £6.90 after that.

SALT beers were front and centre at Sandygate (Hallam) as per. I've written before about SALT Loom being a perfect footie beer. Unfortunately, this one was a bit below par on the night.

Here's the second advantage I have over other SUFC Content Providers. I'm a game ticker, a ground ticker. I don't just watch, and Blog about the First Team. So, I watch games which AREN'T impacted by VAR, which don't suffer from the Premier League nonsense.

Indeed, that SUFC Community Foundation game at Handsworth didn't even have linesmen!!! So, the game flows, there's not constant interventions, the players accept that the Ref has it all on, and they accept what he gives.

Of course, Sheffield United are (deservedly on merit I'll remind you) in the Premier League. Of course that means many fans views are through the lens of Elite Football. So, of course, theres complaints - the game has changed, the game has gone, the game has lost its identity. But, that only applies to the Elite level.

Away from that level, the game is fine thanks.

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My My

Sheffield United 4 v Fulham 0  

The Championship 

Saturday 7 May 2022 

SUFC 2021/22 Game #71 

So. That went well. The Carrier Bag Firm sent the bat signal confirming we're in the Play Offs on 81 minutes. I took the earpiece out. I switched off the BBC Radio 5 Live around the grounds programme on my DAB. Mind you I had previously announced to Row S that Middlesbrough were three down at half time. They were all a little gobsmacked confused when I subsequently announced it as 2-1 to Preston on 48 minutes!!!

While we're on exact timings. I bought MY ticket for the Forest game at 3:46pm. While sitting in The Albion. Now. As it happens. Many people are pointing out on SoMeed & Forums that I haven't bought MY seat. That I've bought someone else's seat. Possibly I've even bought THEIR seat. So, I've deliberately worded it as I bought MY TICKET.

Because, this is where we are as a Club. People actually believing that a seat they have had a ticket for in the past, is somehow THEIR seat for a game in the future, that they don't yet have a ticket for.

(ICYMI, season ticket holders have a few days priority window to buy A ticket. But, the config means that some season ticket holders (ie me) will not be able to buy the same seat they have enjoyed in the regular season. Because, well because, we're no longer in the fucking regular season. So, any season ticket holder can buy any seat).

It's not your seat. It's not my seat. It's just a seat. Used to be wooden, now plastic. My ticket bought at 3:46pm.

As we approached The Albion, my CBF companion said;

"Get me a Pint. Anything. You choose. But not some mad high abv IPA. Hang on. Go previous. If we're not having a fucking mad high abv IPA today, when are we having one."

…is the correct answer…

So. My beer. Note that's my beer. As in the one I bought. This time around. For this celebration. My beer. Despite some fucker at the bar creating about - oooohhhh I used to have that beer all the time, really it's my beer & you shouldn't be allowed to buy it. My beer was…

Stancill Brewery, Komrade IPA on Keg at 6%

Citra and Mosaic hops. Cloudy, unfiltered & chewy. Vegan friendly. Loved it. Punchy without being overpowering. And it's MINE.

Stancill Brewery, Roxie, Ginger Pale on Keg at 4.2%

The keg clip just said Ginger. Fair do. Blended and subtle with it. The best way.

We subsequently adjourned to a very busy BrewDog Sheffield. (To collect a free birthday beer for one of the party).

BrewDog, United For Ukraine, New England IPA on Keg at 5.2%

It just so happens that Chester's in Kremenchuk, Ukraine is a bar which will live long in the memory of The Horrendous Lemons (the Football Firm I have been in all my adult life, a lot longer than the CBF). So, this was an emotional choice. You know the drill. Profits from the beer go to charities associated with Ukraine, etc. 

Irrepressible weren't they? Berge, MGW & Ili combining. Just a perfect mood lifter. MY team & I'll fight anyone who says they're not.

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Ili-Goal

Fulham 0 v Sheffield United 1 

The Championship 

Monday 20 December 2021 

SUFC 2021/22 Game #35 

Glorious. Obviously, that goal was far too early for me. I don't really get nervous. But, it just seemed a long time to have to hold out & endure. What a goal as well. Let's be glass half empty. Ili just caught them cold. They were just looking for everything to settle down. Ili hadn't read the script. 

I've thought for some time that the fact Iliman has NOT grown up in a formal, English, eleven a side structure stands him in better stead. He has a body position & a centre of balance which is unusual. And, it gives him a nano second advantage over his opponents. And he exploits that. To be negative, he's ahead of himself. Two paces with the ball, before he's even got it. If it goes wrong, it's horrendous - what's he fucking doing. Tonight, it went right. Gloriously.

I once worked with an aeroplane enthusiast. Proper Propeller CBF. He once explained to me that modern fighter aircraft are built so they CAN'T fly. But, their computer systems constantly make minute adjustments to the tilty wing bits & flappy tail bits to keep them in the air. That makes them incredibly maneuverable. When they need to turn & dive & all that shit, they literally fall out of the sky. In my better moments, I feel that about Iliman. He's built all wrong. And that means he can twist & turn & hold the ball in a way that unsettles defenders. Long way to go. Let's hope he doesn't fall out of the sky any time soon.

Covid Passports to get into The Cottage. (No drama, worked well, moan like fuck if you prefer, no skin off my nose which has recently had a cotton wool bud up it). Rumours flying around about missing in action McGoldrick & McBurnie and their own Covid Status. And, to cap off the Covid, this arm of the Carrier Bag Firm needed to protect elderly relatives at CBF Mansions in London. So, we elected for the bar down - not many in it street.

Duke Of Hammersmith

238 Shepherds Bush Rd, London W6 7NL

Billed as A Brewdog Pub. They gave me my Equity For Punks discount so I can vouch for that. We got that right, as the time we were in, there were only a few punters. And, we felt good about ourselves for Self Distanced Drinking. It felt sort of Brewdog Lite. A few taps from the Brewdog core range. And a few guests from the Craft Beer Big Hitters. I went;

Siren Craft Brew, Suspended In Hammersmith, Hazy Pale on Keg at 4%

I'm used to the Suspended In Series showcasing Hops & Yeast. So, I'm not quite sure what's going on there. Maybe a Re-Badge. No matter. That was lovely. Easy drinking for a Haze. The juice came pleasantly late.

Nominally, and confusingly, there was a Beer Tick in the ground. To encourage people to get in, and avoid Covid Certificate Chaos outside, they put on a beer for three an' half promotion. One bar, but only one bar, the hut as you walked in, was serving a Brown 'Un.

Fulham FC, Riverside Brew on Keg at 3.8%

Provenance unknown. Got some English Bitter qualities. But, too sweet overall. Still. Could be worse.

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The cleaners & back

Fulham 3 v Sheffield United 0

The Championship

Tuesday 6 March 2018

SUFC 2017/18 Game 71

Big Hug Brewing, Slow Loris All Day IPA on keg at 4% in The White Horse on Parsons Green in SW6. Amber in the glass. Very fresh tasting & therefore very refreshing. Quite sugar, boiled sweet to smell. Some orange bright sweetness in the taste. And a pleasant “unchallenging” bitterness comes out of that. Deffo a what's not to like beer.

I thought that was OK in the circumstances. We had a ridiculously bright spell in the first 10. We created a couple of real chances. We kept at it. Things were changed. We were getting battered down the right, in particular. So, we went to a back four. Still battered to be fair. Brooks looked lively in the free role. Reverted to type. He causes problems. I felt he was less effective once he switched to a more defined up top role.

We really couldn't get into it. If we sat off, they played it around & through Sharp, Donaldson & Duffy. If we pressed, they just played it around & through Sharp, Donaldson & Duffy. If anything, I'd say Fulham were system free. They just trust each other & their skills. They always seemed to have someone. Move it. Not for the sake of it. But, because your Muckers free. Took us to the cleaners and back.

621/1295

Wheels Off

Fulham 3 v Sheffield United 0

Tuesday 25 August 2015

Capital One Cup

Twitter @ball_sup

The White Horse on Parsons Green. Still as minty as ever. But, I got a helpful & knowledgeable barman. I've got it as seven cask, 8 pukka keg. And Urquell on TANK. Great range that.

First up. Harviestoun, Afterglow on cask at a miserly 3%. Straw pale. Lots of front loaded bitterness. Refreshing, but slightly sweet on the nose. Gently balanced. No better way to describe the bitterness than Bitter. No residual sweetness. Maybe some red apple fruit coming through. Superb beer.

Camden vs Stone & Wood, Lager on keg at 4.9%. Love a collab. This tasted refreshing and hoppy at first, but the hoppiness soon died. Better than industrial lager, but pretty ordinary nevertheless.

And, then Standout Beer of the Day. Wylam, Jakehead IPA on cask at a whopping 6.3%. That sort of abv on cask is rare these days. Definitely brown, definitely not pale. Rich, coating in the mouth. Intense, but not overpowering bitterness. Nice long finish. Excellent.

The Modern Football Types seem to think that’s a good result. Concentrate on getting out of this poxy league. I’ll tell you what, let’s just not enter if we feel like that. If the wheels come off any car you’ve worked on, question your skills as a mechanic. The wheels have come off there. Don’t worry, it’s not the Limousine.

But, a chance to impress. Diego hasn’t. Higdon hasn’t, Reed has done OK, but trees remain rooted.

Kieran Wallace did himself some favours at Centre Back. He was used a bit there in pre-season. He deals with the ball. That’s mine. Bosh. That is not everyone’s cup of tea. But, sometimes, it just needs dealing with. Wallace does that well. Then he gets sent-off as the wheels come off. Div.

192/399