The Two Evenings Of Wilder

Hallam 1 v Bottesford Town 2 

Northern Counties East Premier Division 

Tuesday 5 March 2024 

Sheffield United 0 v Arsenal 6 

Premier League 

Monday 4 March 2024 

SUFC 2023/24 Game #52 

Well. That was a rather bizarre two days.

On Monday. I be like…

“What the fuck are you doing now Wilder?”

As he brought on yet another makeshift defender or similar to switch back, yet again, to a conventional four or similar, for the third time in the game or similar.

On Tuesday. I be like…

“I dunno Chris, once you get to the knockouts in the EUROs every team wants to take it to Extra Time and Penalties.”

As Chris Wilder asked ME what I thought about England's chances in Germany. Because. Essentially. I've had a night out drinking with Chris.

Need to tread carefully. Don't want to betray confidences. Grass people up. Or make it difficult.

As part of a milestone Birthday celebration, one of the Carrier Bag Firm was match sponsor at Hallam tonight. You can guess the drill. Reserved table in the 1860 Bar. Beers for his half dozen guests. Free programmes. Sarnies, Rolls a la Sausage, tray of Chips, Kit Kats and Penguins. Tea & Coffee (nah, you're alright). Hallam official looking after us and making sure we have everything we need.

Anyway. Due to said CBF BirthDayee going back ages with Chris Wilder. Chris has pitched up to press his palms. Fair fucking play for that.

Because they are mates, the conversation was matey. Sky Sports News showed re-runs of the Arsenal goals.

“Can't you put EastEnders on?”

Once it'd been established I go to England games, the conversation turned to what I thought our chances were.

I mentioned Bukayo Saka. But, I think I got away with it!!!

AnyRoadUp. Not the time to ask…

“How the fuck have we managed to sign so and so?”

Wilder told a great story about his transition from professional footballer to labourer. Having “retired” and playing for Alfreton Town. And getting picked up the next morning at 0700 bells to go and put up Roof Rafters on a housing development near Meadowhall. Falling off ladders, lying in “shit”, with the rafter across his chest pinning him down. Going up to the gaffers on Friday tea. For one hundred and fifty. Cash in hand.

I didn't want him to catch me writing his exact words down. But you'll understand if I give the flavour.

“Fuck this for a game of soldiers.”

I found the whole two evenings of Wilder thing partly unsettling. And partly affirming. I've celebrated the times we were an “identity club”. With Wilder at the helm. But, I've also said we shouldn't have brought him back for this second go round. So, I'll admit I find it Sheffield United Amusing (™) that, having been brought in to turn things around just a little bit, he clearly can't turn them in any direction whatsoever.

I'm not a shouter and a bawler. But, I do sit there in the South Stand. Looking at the back of his head. And thinking - who? what? where? how? but mainly why?

Yet. Here I was. Passing him a Sausage Roll. Seeing him dressed as a Human has made me think on a bit. That's the affirmation.

You know what I find impressive about that Arsenal show? It's not the skill and quality of those short, sharp, pinpoint passes around the box. It's simply the fact that they're prepared to play them.

I mean. If he'd asked. How the fuck have we gone four, and narrow four at that. With Saka hugging their right. And prepared to come inside or outside. One on one. With Trusty. How the fuck?

I had a lovely time at Hallam. Stayed around our table in the 1860. Didn't see a ball kicked. As sponsors, we were choosing and presenting the Man of the Match. Initially, we were going to give it Hugo Warhurst irrespective. But, at the death we were told - no presentation tonight.

From the branded glasses, I deduce that they might be having Thornbridge on the bar “permanently” Tonight it was Thornbridge, Green Mountain, IPA on Keg at 4.3%. And many of them. That was where SALT Jute has been recently. SALT Loom was still on.

Chris was on fucking bottles of Moretti. Be lucky if he's invited back on that performance.

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Proud To Have One Pence Left

Arsenal 5 v Sheffield United 0 

Premier League 

Saturday 28 October 2023 

SUFC 2023/24 Game #18 

Sheffield United 1 v Manchester United 2 

Premier League 

Saturday 21 October 2023 

SUFC 2023/24 Game #17 

England 3 v Italy 1 

UEFA EURO 2024 Qualifiers Group C 

Tuesday 17 October 2023 

Played at Wembley 

NFDR

No Football Don't Read 

The Carrier Bag Firm have, amongst their ranks, a Beer Philanthropist. Investment Clubs, GoFundMes, Crowd Funding - they're all over it. New brewery kit. A new bar front. A Taproom refurb. Where do I send the cheque?

You can guess the drill. Chuck some money in up front. Help the brewery or bar get summat done. And you get something in return. One pound fifty bar credit back for every quid you chuck in. Ten percent discount for life. That sort of thing.

Over the years, we've lost track of the various credits & discounts. Previously, money has deffo been put into Hammerton Brewery Crowd Funding. Hammerton Taproom is on the Roman Way Industrial Estate in N7. That's not exactly convenient for Arsenal's ground. But, a combination of road closures, coach parking restrictions and modern Premier League logistics, meant we felt Hammerton was doable for an hour or two before kick off.

But, what we couldn't recall is whether we still had any discount or credit. Here's how the convo went.

"We're sure we've crowdfunded you in the past. But, we're not sure what rewards we're still enjoying. If we give you our details, is there a database or some shit you could look us up on?"

"Sure, just let me fire it up"

"Oh yes, here you are. That's great. You've got £50.01 credit over the bar."

Whoop. Whoop. Of course, the TRUE JOY is in what's NOT being said there. Fifty Quid and One Penny credit. Now, our crowdfunding would naturally come in rounded units - tens, twenties, fifties, etc. So, that means that on a previous visit to Hammerton, to spend previous credit, it was like a version of Beer Countdown. We manipulated the Beer Board, and the prices, and our credit to get it down to just One Pence. Just One Pence. That is a marvellous Carrier Bag Firm algorithm achievement right there.

Hammerton, Islington Lager, a Californian Common at 4.7% was one of my gateway, breakthrough beers. One of the beers I tasted and thought - oh, that's what beer tastes like us it. One of the beers that got my started on Craft Beer. Hammerton, Pentonville, Oyster Stout at 5.3% was exceptional. You rarely see either of those anymore. Pity. Times change.

Neither were on among the fourteen of Hammerton on Keg. And three guests.

Hammerton Brewery, Collab with Coronado Brewing Co (San Diego), Across The Pond, IPA on Keg at 5.6%

Challenger, Godiva & Olicana Hops from the UK and Bru-1 and Azzaca from the USA. Nice beer. I felt it was a bit between two stools. Not clear and simple enough to be West Coast style. But very little going on in the cloud. There was a nice, underpinning sweetness from the malt.

Hammerton Brewery, Collab with Dogma Brewery (Belgrade), One In The Wood, Hazy IPA on Keg at 5.3%

A double dry hopped Pale Ale with Cascade, Mosaic and Citra Hops. Lovely. A lot of orange and lemon. But some tropical fruits as well. Nicely balanced bitterness.

Hammerton Brewery, Melba King, Fruited Gose on Keg at 4.4%

Fruited with raspberries and fresh peaches. Maybe could have done with more sour to offset all that fruit. Still, a nice dessert in a glass beer.

I love Eddie Nketiah. Give him the amount of space we gave him. And he's deadly. Trusty not tight enough in the first place, Robinson backing off further. You're fucked.

Souza and Norwood. But, they put Norwood as the Front Screen at corners. That is my preference. No McBurnie. So Brewster was the Zone. No. He just watches it sail over him and into danger.

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Mad Giant Art_Sup

Arsenal 1 v Sheffield United 1 

The Premier League 

Saturday 18 January 2020 

SUFC 2019/20 Game 49 

England 192-4 

v South Africa 

Close on Day 1 

Friday 24 January 2020 

4th Test 

Played at The Wanderers, Johannesburg 

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South African different Beer Ticks - 131

Short, sharp precision strike by the Carrier Bag Firm for just this one Test. Squeezed in from Heathrow between Arsenal away & Palace away. Basically, unless "something weird happens", it's going to be mainly Room Beers. I started this trip on 121 ZA beer ticks. But, a few days to spare before Stuart Broad can get at 'em. We rustled ourselves to downtown Jo'Burg. Bang opposite the imposing (and frankly decaying) Johannesburg Central Police Station.

Ahmed Timol was a 30 year old teacher, political activist & member of the South African Communist Party. He was also a member of Umkhonto we Sizwe, the Military Wing of the ANC. In October 1971, Ahmed plunged to his death from the 10th floor of that Central Police Station. An official inquest into his death in 1972 backed the Police claim that it was suicide. But, a subsequent 2017 inquest overturned that ruling. Ahmed had been murdered by The Security Police. The last prisoner to die in the Johannesburg Central Police Station was Clayton Sithole. Found hanging in his cell just 11 days before Mandela was released. His death was ruled a suicide. Fuck Sake.

Anyway Mad Giant Brewery speaks to different times. Thank Fuck. Stuck in a cavernous warehouse. With a sprawling patio deck & beer garden. First up. I'm a bit of a fan of ridiculously over the top, statement Street Art. Inner City Jozi is tagged to within an inch of it's life. And, there is a remarkable bit of work inside Mad Giant. By Justin Nomad. From my Daytime Operations Base at the other side of the bar, it looked like a "painting" of a young lady's face. A hoodie pulled over her head, covering one eye. Her hair tumbling out of the hood. Eye Catching. But, when you're actually over there. Having a look at the Pump Clips. Planning a route through the Ale. You realise it's NOT a "painting". It's actually a sculpture cut into the plaster & brickwork. Truly remarkable.

Mad Giant, Killer Hop, Pale Ale on keg at 5%

I was a little disappointed with that. At first I found myself searching for the sugar. And found the merest hint of peach. But, not sure how, that grows a little too much into spooned in Tate n Lyle. That killed what was in any case, very little Hop Action.

Mad Giant, Urban Legend, IPA on keg at 6%

That was much better. Tan Loafer Brown. Very inviting. Carping, there was a little too much sugar up top. But, once the Hops kick in ready & rough, you're back in the game. A little sweetness in the finish tidies it all up.

Mad Giant, Sho't Left, New England Pale on keg

Matey rushed me over a taster of that one after I'd ordered the Cannabis Beer. Presumably he thought I couldn't handle it. Anyway, it came up great in the taster. Juicy never Gloopy. Growing flavour. Mysteriously, not all that seemed to survive once I got a proper glass on. Still thoroughly enjoyable mind. Levelled out into diluted orange squash in the finish.

Mad Giant, Rogue Unit, Funked up Brett Barreled & other shit, from a bottle at 5.2%

Deliberately I'm sure, virtually no carbonation. He was very keen to pour it for me, so I got some, but not all, of the sediment. Lots of Strongbow Cider on the nose. First schlurp, a bit harsh. But softens as you crack on. Quite a bit of Sherry. Don't ask me why, but my noggin went - needs ageing. The best before was 2023. Keep one for me. We'll be back.

Somewhat annoyingly, Outstanding Beer Of The Day was not from Mad Giant. But a guest from Jack Black's Brewing Co in Cape Town. 

Jack Black's, Mega Ale, Imperial IPA on keg at 8%

One of those lovely, don't piss around with it, down the line DIPAs. I swear you could tell it'd be great just by looking at the head. Tobacco bitterness. Thick n rich from the off. Excellent.

Up top, on a rain & light restricted day, Sibley & Crawley got through the longer than usual initial session.  But, then went within 15 balls of each other. Leaving us on 116 for 2. It looked like there's some pace in it. But, I didn't feel it was hooping around. Just a touch of finding a way to get out really. So, they did. Stokes scratched around for two. Sub 200 for 4 isn't awful. But, a platform was being built. Lot on for Root & Pope come the morrow.

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I have now Blogged from 897 games in 1,984 days

The Tactical Tiller

Sheffield United 1 v Arsenal 0

Premier League

Monday 21 October 2019

SUFC 2019/20 Game 32

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What a great win. It feels like we are really in it now. Celebrating the win with a few beers later on, I got distracted by some defensive statistics. I sort of get it a bit more now. We do not park the bus. We are not a defensive team. But we are very good at defending. Not as good at attacking, but that is the game. Don't concede any, score one. With our game plan, I feel it is desperately important that we score first. We can then manage the game. Small adjustments on the tactical tiller. substitutions at the right time. And manage the game over the line from there.

We seem very well organised defensively for corners. Over the course of that game, McGoldrick & McBurnie played The Zone Man. At one stage, I saw Darren Ward frantically signaling to Lundstram. pointing at him and making a circular motion with his hand. In real-time, I had no idea. But, of course, at the next corner it dawned on me that Darren had just been making sure Lundstram realised he was now the zone man. Gotta love that flexibility and versatility. Three different zone men all doing the job.

We are by no means just a set-piece team. But it's clearly an important part of the game at this level. There is always something going on. The ones I really like are the simple routines which get one of the centre backs free at the back stick. And lo, it came to pass. Norwood zings one over, O'Connell gets free, heads it into the mixer, the Moose does the rest.

On Saturday, I criticised BrewDog for having too many beers for Collabfest 2019. but let's turn it 180, let's turn it to our advantage. It's going to take a while to shift them. So don't be surprised if they are randomly turning up on BrewDog bars for the next few weeks. Despite the fact that Collabfest officially finished on Sunday, BrewDog Sheffield certainly had a good few still on. One door closes, etc. I was able to plough through another four taking the running total up to 11.

Hawkshead Brewery (Cumbria) x BrewDog Carlisle, Costa Del Solway, Tart IPA at 7.4%.

Nice & juicy. But, there is definitely a hop kick at the end. Keeps coming.

Double-Barrelled Brewery (Reading) x BrewDog Oxford, Shark In My Roof, Imperial Caramel Porter at 7.3%.

Great mix of flavours. I was getting lots of liquorice in the first gulp. But, further in, it's deep red fruit. But, still got liquorice in it.

St. Mars of the Desert (Sheffield) x BrewDog Sheffield, Shoquaddyquaddy, Belgian Quadruple at 9.4%.

Well. Where to start. Full. On. A load of Toffee Crisps boiled for two hours. Takes your head off.

Brewgineers (Goteborg) x BrewDog Goteborg, Elderflower Lemon IPA at 7.4%.

Yes. A banging simple beer. The bitterness grows. But stays the right side of harsh.

Stats
I have now Blogged from 867 games in 1,889 days