Gets Me Out The House

Sheffield United Community Foundation U19 6 v Farsley Celtic U19 2 

National Football Youth League, North East Championship 

Wednesday 8 May 2024 

Played at Handsworth 

SUFC 2023/24 Game #69 

NBDR

No Beer Don't Read

The Sheffield United Community Foundation arm of the club is where youngsters (male and female) study for qualifications. While also having a football training schedule and games programme. Some clubs term these the Shadow Youth Teams (SYT).

The National Football Youth League, understandably, make a play on kids who have played in their league, and go on to get professional contracts. Those include Shirecliffe Academy Graduate CJ Hamilton. And former SUFC first teamer John Brayford. Indeed, Marshall Francis who played at Bramall Lane in the week against Sheffield Wednesday U18 played in the NFYL for Reading.

But, realistically, none of those youngsters up at Handsworth today are going to get places in the full on Academy at Shirecliffe. The numbers don't work.

To get personal. The SUFC Community Foundation teams are great for people in “my position”. It's a - get your steps in two an’ half hours walk - from Carrier Bag Firm Towers to Olivers Mount. The weather is getting better. The toilets are open. Other CBF pitch up. So there's Bollocks to be talked. 

“It gets me out the house…”

I've managed six home games this season. And indeed, one away game. On the site where Carling Lager was first brewed in the UK!!!

Time for a round up.

The A team finished 4th (of seven) in the Community and Education Football Alliance League North Central 1.

Other teams have still got games to play in the Community and Education Football Alliance League North East Central 1. But United B are finished. Currently sitting 5th (of seven).

The C team still have two games to play in the Community and Education Football Alliance League North Central 2. Currently sitting 7th (of ten).

The highest level the Community teams play is the game I saw today, in the National Football Youth League North East Championship. We've still got three games to play. But are handily placed in 2nd place behind Middlesbrough. We've got to go there on the last day of the season.

Two nil up at half time today. Became six nil on 80. Before we let Celtic back into it a bit.

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Is It Safe?

Sheffield United U17 2 v Crewe Alexandra U17 1 

U17 Professional Development League Cup, Group C 

Thursday 9 November 2023 

Played at Shirecliffe 

SUFC 2023/24 Game #23 

Sheffield United Community Foundation U19 4 v i2i International Soccer Academy "Green" 1 

National Football Youth League, North East Championship 

Wednesday 8 November 2022 

Played at Handsworth 

SUFC 2023/24 Game #22

Sheffield United Community Foundation A 1 v Doncaster Rovers College A 3 

Community & Education Football Alliance League, North Central 1 

Wednesday 8 November 2023 

Played at Handsworth 

SUFC 2023/24 Game #21 

NBDR 

No Beer Don't Read 

The usual ballache getting in at Shirecliffe. If you turn up in a car, they give you a cursory look, lift the barriers and let you in. If you say you're a player's relative, they give you a cursory look, and welcome you in. But, if you're in the Carrier Bag Firm, and turn up on foot, three stewards descend out of the hut to ask for your credentials.

"No point me telling you anything other than the truth. I'm a Sheffield United fan. Our Academy team are playing over there. I can more or less see them from here. Warming up on that pitch there. With the lights on. I want to come in and watch the game please."

The main word you will hear is NO. Although, fair play, you will hear SORRY quite a lot. Security will deploy the word SAFEGUARDING. You, as a former producer of the School League Tables, who once had access to the details of every child who has been through the English & Welsh education system since 1970, will know full fucking well what SAFEGUARDING is thank you very much. You will not say that. Because it won't get you anywhere.

You will be told you need a MATCH PASS. You, will know full well that no such fucking thing exists. As car after car and "relative" after relative is waved in with no suggestion of a MATCH PASS, you will not say that. Because it won't get you anywhere.

You will be bombarded by any amount of nonsense fuzzy logic as to why you can't come in. That logic will evaporate while the words are still cloudy vapour in the cold, November S3 air. You will not say that. Because, on this occasion, confronted by this scenario, logic is your enemy.

You know, in your ever colder bones, that the longer you stand there, being told you can't come in, the more people will be let in with a cheery wave. And, guess what, the guys on the gate are FUCKING HUMAN. And they will begin to understand the ridiculous dance we are all in. 

Key at this point is - don't make them back down. Don't make them feel uncomfortable. Put it on someone else.

"Of course. Of course. I fully understand. But, you'll understand my disappointment. I've spent ages getting here. On a miserable night. I'm just disappointed. You are letting people in. I can see that. I just think if you explain to the office that there's some poor old guy here, who's come miles, and just wants to watch the game. They'll give me permission, like all these other people you've let in have got permission. I'm just disappointed is all. You'll understand my disappointment."

At this point, proximity is important, take five paces away, let them be the Alphas. You fucking know you're getting in. They still think you're not. Look at the floor. Avoid eye contact.

Mutter. Mutter. Mutter. (Pretend conversations on Walkie Talkie).

"Thank you Sir. We've now had clarification. The pitch is over there."

The U17 PDL Cup is played under lights. At Shirecliffe, that means the plastic pitch. At Shirecliffe, that means one of the pylons will inevitably be out and it will be virtually impossible to see that part of the pitch and the play. 

A ninety mile an hour, no composure, chests out, adrenaline game. Very feisty at times. The fucking swearing was appalling. You wouldn't think they'd want that in such a Safeguarded Environment would you. Both teams were giving needless fouls away all over the parts of the pitch I could actually see. On 24, one of those resulting free kicks just outside the Blades box ended in the opening Alex goal.

A great equaliser just before half time. And on 75, United won it. Crewe failed to clear a corner. It did fall nicely to the United youngster. But, the technique and power on the shot was phenomenal.

That leaves the group wide open. In this format, you only play each other once, three games each. After last night, United, Crewe, Watford and Sheffield Wednesday have all played two, won one, lost one. All four sitting on three points, one to play.

No such shenanigans for that double header at Handsworth. Of course, during the week, Handsworth actually IS an educational establishment, a school, a college. Some of the SUFC Community teams play in the Community & Education Football Alliance League. But, proper safeguarding risk assessment, and proportional measures mean we're good to go.

i2i International Soccer Academy is a does what it says on the tin private Football Academy run out of Northumbria University and Leeds Beckett. England Youth, Leeds United, Sampdoria, Hellas Verona & Torino midfielder Ronaldo Viera is an i2i graduate. Of course, Ronaldo was also a Sheffield United transfer target back in the day. That turned into a fairly comfortable 4-1 run out for this Learny Blades team.

Although, earlier in the day, a Doncaster Rovers team were too strong for the United A team.

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The Learny Blades

Sheffield United Community Foundation U19 4 v Sheffield Wednesday Community Programme U19 1 

National Football Youth League, North East Championship 

Wednesday 20 September 2023 

Played at Handsworth 

SUFC Game #11 

So, you'll be needing my Annual NFYL Dossier as an introduction to this Blog.

NB:DR

No Beer Don't Read 

Many professional football clubs now have a link with local education colleges and/or sport hubs and/or local clubs at a lower level. Those links are often run through Community Foundations/Programmes. That's the case for both Sheffield clubs involved in today's College Derby.

The lads n lasses attending the courses get a "post 16" education, which can lead to University. Many of the courses have a sport, sport science, hospitality, etc bent. The youngsters get classroom based education and football training and a fixture list.

These courses can be a way of engaging youngsters who aren't attracted to a more formal education setting. And allowing them to continue their studies and get some qualifications. Some clubs use these college programmes for youngsters who have already been in younger age Academy football. But, have been released. They can be a transition for kids who won't make the grade in professional football.

Just occasionally, United have invited kids from the college programme to trial with the main Academy at Shirecliffe. So, as well as an exit strategy, they can also be an entry pathway as well.

It is my impression, that a wider range of clubs are engaging in college programmes. Indeed, for those clubs further down the pyramid than United and Wednesday, the college programmes provide a convenient way of running an Academy team. Which they might otherwise find impossible.

For instance, the North East Championship features;

Sheffield United

Sheffield Wednesday

Middlesbrough

Barnsley

Newcastle United

Rotherham United

Sunderland

and;

Morpeth Town

Farsley Celtic

and;

i2i International (run in cooperation with Northumbria, Newcastle and Leeds Beckett Universities)

UFCA (Ultimate Football Coaching Academy)

So. A neat mix of "elite" clubs, non-league clubs and private football academies. This arm of Sheffield United's Community Foundation is run out of Handsworth FC. And, I know some of the youngsters also play for Handsworth Reserves. So, a multi model benefiting everyone. United run four men's teams as part of the programme. And women's teams as well. Some youngsters even train as referees and linos. And, youngsters pursuing "media" careers get involved in Social Media and longer reports of the games.

The best shorthand description is Shadow Youth Teams. Of course, nobody wants eight nil batterings. But, it's worth remembering that football clubs should be much more than "the first team".

John Brayford came through such a programme. CJ Ceeeej Hamilton came through such a programme. Most recently , Chesterfield have offered professional contracts to four youngsters from their programme.

Marshall Francis made his debut for Sheffield United U21 at the end of August. He's at Shirecliffe right now. Marshall came through such a programme (Reading).

Young kids, running around in red n white, with a crossed swords and white rose badge, with the results on the FA Website, and the Carrier Bag Firm shouting "come on United" from the shed. Fuck me.

This. Is. Football.

A deserved win for The Learny Blades. A nice standard, particularly in the pissing rain. Ignore the goal times on the sheet. United opened on 34. After having a number of chances, the first goal came from a - that was a bit lucky - deflection. Lead extended just before HT. The Owls pulled one back on 58. But, United pressed on and on. A cross shot on 64 and a tap in after a lovely move and square ball on 76 brought the lesson to an end.

Morpeth Town away next Wednesday. I said Morpeth Town AWAY.

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Fake Hate

Nottingham Forest 1 v Sheffield United 2 

(3-3 on aggregate, NFFC win 3-2 on Penalties) 

Championship Play Off Semi Final 

Tuesday 17 May 2022 

SUFC 2021/22 Game #75

Sheffield United Community Foundation U19 2 v Newcastle United Foundation U19 2 

National Football Youth League 

North East Premier 

Wednesday 18 May 2022 

Played at Handsworth 

SUFC 2021/22 Game #76 

Well that was a truly marvelous beer stumble across, on an amazing football night (note football night not night of football). The ticket gangmaster has lost it if I'm honest. He issued a - straight to Nottingham, no pub stop - edict. This was despite repeated, and I emphasise repeated, shouts of "Sherwood, Sherwood" from the mid section of the bus.

Thankfully, as we entered Nottingham, and headed down towards Sneinton Market, the gangmaster had the good grace to shout down the bus…

"Anyone who wants to get off come down the front and tell us."

I knocked three Civilians over in my haste. I was sort of targeting Bunkers Hill Inn. But, we regrouped and defaulted to a place we'd never been in before.

Fox & Grapes

21 Southwell Rd, Nottingham NG1 1DL

Man, what a find. (Turns out there's a MicroPub, Partizan Tavern, on the other corner as well). The F&G is a Castle Rock pub. The two geezers behind the bar were incredibly helpful & friendly. Didn't mind my questions & photos. 

Four Castle Rocks on Cask, one on Keg. Four guest Cask. Six guest Keg. Welcome to Nottingham.

I'm singling out;

Black Iris Brewery (Nottingham), Let The Devil In, American IPA on Cask at 5.5%

Dry hopped with El Dorado and Ekuanot with Cascade hops thrown in at the bittering stage.

My mindset stayed roughly the same all night. My animation levels & gesticulation metrics swung wildly. These are the nights (days are also available) you want. Do you want to win 'em … rhetorical. Do you mind if you lose 'em … ridiculous. But, fuck me, you want to be at them. Please don't think I'm ignoring all the well publicised surrounding nonsense. But, them's the nights.

Remember, I write parody.

I'm disappointed in the management & leadership on the night if I'm honest.

What it needed was someone, Billy would have done, to huddle the team.

"Win or lose - on the whistle or final penalty - every player & member of staff, the kitman, the Twitter Guy, those on crutches, those in ski boots, the fucking lot, rush over to that away corner, form a square, form a phalanx, form summat else - don't bother me with the details - we'll fucking sort it from there - in front of our fans - this is us.

Remember I write parody.

It's frustrating. I want noisy, intimidating atmospheres. But, joyous. In support of your own team. Not snarling. In support of some fake, learned behaviour, hatred. The Tricky Trees running on the pitch. They've read the trending script. Let the Pyro go. Run past your own players. The ones you're supposed to be celebrating with. Sprint past the tunnel. Where the management and staff will be congregating. Leave them in your wake. Because, the real objective is to get twenty yards away from the ragtag collection of aged walking stick wielders on Row A of the Away End. And give 'em The Vees. Fake hatred - a lot from our fans as well.

(I like Steve Cooper a lot) Forest were good in the first half. High tempo. Can't get your breath tempo. Can't think tempo. But, we were far from overrun. A great save from Iliman. Or it could have all looked different.

You couldn't fault any of our lot. Jack Robinson was immense. And, he showed he's a real attacking threat getting on the end of corners. My vocabulary narrowed significantly after Fleck's go ahead on the night goal. Basically, all I could muster was (and I emphasise "these" were Forest).

"These can't win it in 90"

"These don't know how to win from here"

"These are gone"

Repeated, ultimately incorrectly I'll concede, time after time.

And, I'll admit to gallows humour…

"I know, I know, let's have Penalties, but with silly run ups"

How has that late swivelling chance from Iliman not gone in? But, even then, core mood remained - these are the nights.

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What Is A CDM, Who Cares

Sheffield United Community Foundation U19 1 v Barnsley SYT U19 2 

National Football Youth League 

North East Premier 

Wednesday 23 February 2022 

Played at Handsworth 

SUFC 2021/22 Game #55 

Sheffield United 1 v Blackburn Rovers 0 

The Championship 

Wednesday 23 February 2022 

SUFC 2021/22 Game #56 

Today's Blog features a Screen Grab. I know. Making a bid for a Blogging award or some shit. I sit in the Bramall Lane upper corner. Looking right down the touchline. Piss poor for judging offsides. But, it it goes out for a throw in, I'll fucking know. That view also gives a particular perspective on likely substitutions. You can see McCall waving subs back from the corner flag warm up. You get a bit of a view of them peeling off various layers of polyester training kit, sponsored by companies you have never heard of.

And, on 66 minutes, I had a down the line view of the Charlie Goode incident. Firstly, it just looked bad, even in real time. Whatever the merits on replay (where I thought it looked fucking worse), you can see why he's Reded him. But, I then had a forensic view of who had come from where to have their say in the aftermath.

Here's the grab timed at 66 minutes. Baldock in separatist negotiations. Goode himself taking it all in. Norwood patrolling the periphery. And, Oli McBurnie with the red mist. 

Here's the social media timed 12 minutes later at 78. That social media is announcing McBurnie actually coming ON as a Sub, despite his earlier "intervention".

One for the ages that one.

Incidentally, there's a dilemma the defensive line players face when doing their thang after a bad tackle. Goode goes through him. Gets to his feet and surveys the scene. There's like a frozen second. Then all hell breaks loose as Blackburn players start arriving. Gibbs-White in particular spreads his arms, stops/grabs three players from getting to Charlie Boy. Instinct. Protect your mate. Of course, if he lets them through, there's every chance they'll do summat crazy. And could be in the book (or worse) themselves. In the crazy world of football, Gibbs-White has sort of done the Blackburn players a favour by stopping them.

People often ask me…

"Phil, what do you see as the main differentiating characteristics & requirements between a Central Defensive Midfielder & a Wide Attacking Midfielder?"

Until today, I have tried, politely, to get over the point that I couldn't give two fucks. But, back to that view from the BLUT. Uninterrupted & diagonal. Corner Flag to Corner Flag. Now I get it. WhatSorryPardon. Are you now asking - "in what sense do you get it?"

Because, I kept pointing and shouting…

Sander Berge has fucking started with it over there!!!

And now he's still fucking got it down here!!!

That, Brothers, Sisters, Others is your current Wide Attacking Midfielder. Superb.

I see that Rovers are still managed by Tony Mowbray. Appointed February 2017. I see that Kyron Gordon wears #34 for Sheffield United. He was on the Bench. With Basham's injury being number one on the rumours chart. And with Goode suspended. Kyron's first team pathway has been swept clean a little. But, I wonder if either Mowbray or Gordon remember a previous time their planets aligned.

On 27 August 2019, Mowbray's Rovers were trailing 2-1 to The Blades at the Lane in the EFL Cup. Chasing the game, Tony was getting Royally pissed off at United's Ballboys/Ballgirls holding on to the spherical & not returning it quick enough. His patience broke & he "had a word" with one of the Ballboys & was booked for it. That Ballboy was Kyron Gordon. There was a bit of Social Media & Fans Forum chatter at the time about Mowbray gobbing off to a 12 year old. And, Mowbray was called all the names under the Sun. And some under the fucking Moon as well.

I pointed out at the time that "12 year old" had in fact captained our U18s many times & was now a regular for the U23s. The very day before, I had witnessed that same Kyron Gordon/Ballboy chase a referee across the pitch, while playing for SUFC U23s - demanding to know why the ref was "chatting shit" to him. Anyway. Tony say Hello to Kyron (again).

The pre match was in the Ecclesall Ale Club (again). It's got a LOT going for it. Great & changing beer range. Right side of town for me. But, not necessarily for many others going to The Lane. Means it's usually possible to find a seat. However, tonight it felt a bit cliquey. At one stage, I was convinced that everyone in the pub knew everyone apart from me. Barstaff & Customers seemed indistinguishable & interchangeable. All constantly disappearing out the front for a fag. At one stage, each time the door opened, I'd taken to giving a cheery "hi mate" to whoever came in, in the hope I'd be inducted. Anyway. Cliquey in an OK, I'm not complaining, way. Good luck. (It would be nice to know who are the actual barstaff though).

With games coming thick n fast. And a joyous United team that it's difficult to tear out of your head. My alcohol units are drifting, drifting I tells ye. So, I am currently celebrating South of 4% hoppy table beers.

Vocation Brewery (Hebden Bridge), Low Altitude, on Keg at 3.4%

The Bumph says Simcoe, Sabra & Talus Hops. It was super. Lots of tropics. Orange Juice and Pineapple. Full of flavour. But, came up a bit short on bittering.

Redwillow Brewery (Macclesfield), Nelson Dip Hop, NZ Pale on Keg at 4.1%

Nelson Sauvin Hops. Some stuff about Hop Dipping claimed. Shrugs. Dipping Hops into the beer? Shrugs (again). Very grapey. Shocks you at first. But it calms down once you get used to it. There's a sort of tobacco and/or biscuit thing going on as well.

(Later. In the Rising Sun, Fulwood Road)

Abbeydale Brewery, Unbeliever Apricot Gose on Keg at 4.4%

The barstaff tasted it "with me" as I ordered it. Fair to say - divided opinion. I didn't find it too sharp, nor too sour. It was one of them alchemy beers. How do they make it taste like that from where they started? Alchemy. Maybe even balsamic in the smell. The taste is all about those apricots though. Salt comes through more & more as you attack it. That salt works exceedingly well.

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It's A Miracle, She Can See

Sheffield United Community Foundation U19 1 v Sunderland FOL U19 3 

National Football Youth League 

North East Premier 

Wednesday 12 January 2022 

Played at Handsworth 

SUFC 2021/22 Game #39 

Everton U18 2 v Sheffield United U18 1 

FA Youth Cup Round 4 

Friday 14 January 2022 

Played at Goodison Park 

SUFC 2021/22 Game #40 

Derby County 2 v Sheffield United 0 

The Championship 

Saturday 15 January 2022 

SUFC 2021/22 Game #41 

Games coming thick n fast at the mo' (Love It). Lots of meeting n greeting as well (socially distanced, we're not savages). This Blog is going to concentrate on the wonderful day out in Liverpool & the FA Youth Cup game in the evening at Goodison Park.

Roscoe Head

24 Roscoe St, Liverpool L1 2SX

I haven't checked recently, but the Roscoe Head was historically part of the CAMRA Famous Five. The five pubs which had been in every edition of the CAMRA Good Beer Guide. Alongside the Star Tavern & Buckingham Arms in London, the Square & Compass in Dorset and the Queen's Head in Cambridge. 

The Roscoe Head is named for/after William Roscoe. A leading campaigner against the slave trade. Born in Liverpool in 1753. His Dad had a Pub called the Bowling Green in Mount Pleasant, Liverpool. Roscoe was elected as an MP in 1806. He quickly realised it "wasn't for him". But, he was around long enough to cast his vote for the (successful) abolition of the slave trade. Salute. 

Later in life, Roscoe was asked to investigate the claims of Margaret M'Avoy. Mags was a blind girl who, remarkably, demonstrated she could read ordinary books using her fingers. Billy R was asked to fully and forensically examine the science behind Margaret's SuperPower. That he did. With almost Carrier Bag Firm like attention to detail & wormholes & bollocks. Oh, he investigated alright. And, obvs, concluded that Margaret's amazing abilities were due to the fact that she was NOT blind. She was in fact a BLAGGER.

Love owt like that, me.

The Roscoe Head certainly looks the part. Small bar front, Higgledy Piggledy rooms off. Six cask ales chalked up. I went;

Neptune Brewery (Liverpool), Ezili, Pale Ale on Cask at 4%

Lots of lime & other citrusy doofer tiddly. A hint of bitterness up top, but that's really the only bitter. Full of flavour mind. Easy drinking sun's out but it's freezing beer. 3.75/5

The next leg saw us at another CAMRA Guide pub just along the street.

The Grapes

60 Roscoe St, Liverpool L1 9DW

The Grapes dates back to 1804.

I just love places like this. A glorious mix of traditional & funky. Bright, open, welcoming place, and you can see in through the windows. Seven cask on the handpulls & four pukka keg. Deffo Outstanding Pub Of The Day. I went;

Neptune Brewery (again) & Unbarred Brewery (Brighton) Collab, Albion, Scotch Ale, Wee Heavy on Cask at 5.7%

That smells of toffee. The taste is all about the malt. Comes stronger as you let it slide down. Some gentle burnt offering. Lovely beer. 3.75/5

Onwards. Onwards. To.

Baltic Fleet

33A Wapping, Liverpool L1 8DQ

(Some chimneys painted red to look like the funnels on a liner). Very sudued, verging on grim, grey & white paintwork outside. 

Five cask & two keg on. I went;

Black Lodge Brewery (Liverpool), Crash On The Hill, Pale Ale on Cask at 3.9%

That was glorious. Particularly for a 3.niner. Galaxy hopped unfined & unfiltered. Lot of florals, but then some broadly apricot sugar. Everything lingering. Deffo Outstanding Beer Of The Day. 4/ 5

And, finally;

Love Lane Brewery, Bar & Kitchen

62 Bridgewater St, Liverpool L1 0AY

All bright, modern & gleaming in a converted industrial premises way. There seemed to be many rumours of Higson's on cask and keg, as well as their own. But, no materialisation. This place definitely needs more exploration on a subsequent visit. 

There were six Love Lane on Keg, and a couple of broadly industrial kegs. I went;

Love Lane Brewery, Session IPA on Keg at 4.1%

(Claims Citra, Columbus & Chinook Hops). Smells fresh n zingy. Quite a lot of bitterness in it. But, everything comes in a rush. Fair enough for a "Session". 3.5/5

In a sense, 2-1 flattered the Young Blades. But, the wonderful nature of the Youth Cup means that anything can happen, anytime. Our goal came from Sai Sachdev on 88. But, who knows. Everything in for the 2+ 5. Blag an equaliser. Extra Time. Game on. But, unfortunately, that didn't happen. 

(Geary did the bench, in the absence of a newly appointed U18 lead). I felt the set up was a little conservative. Peck & Arblaster are (at their level) very good players. Capable of closing, winning the ball, and using it creatively going forward. But, they were mainly very deep. And the attacking option was just try accurately in the channel for Louie Marsh and, particularly, Theo Williams. Don't get me wrong, that worked a good few times and created chances. But, it all looked a bit one dimensional.

In the second half, the Toffees really got it together, passes stretching our midfield and defence & pushing them ever deeper. And our outlet just became something hopeful.

Two down on 63, Geary sent on Fernando Macedo (76), Owen Hampson (78) and Will Lankshear (82). A bit more energy. A lot of Brazilian flag waving & rhythmic hand clapping from the Upper Bullens Road Stand. But no great difference to our chances.

I'm going to single out left back (#3) Tom Angell. Sorry. But I hope it's obvious to Tom himself & the Academy staff that an upwards growth spurt would help him out. He's smaller rather than taller. Not a titch by any means. He's got strong legs & body strength. He's actually wonderful in the air on balls hit down his bit. Reads them well. Sets his body. Good get off the ground technique and hang time. Powerful. He wins headers in other areas as well. And, he don't stop. Engine running all the time. Reading everything. Closing everything.

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Two 5s And Two 6s Doesn't Make 22

Sheffield United Community Foundation U19 2 v Burnley SYT 1 

National Football Youth League 

North East Premier 

Wednesday 1 December 2021 

Played at Handsworth 

SUFC 2021/22 Game #29  

Carrier Bag Firmers generally have some way they determine whether the game they have watched is tickable, whether they can count it in their records. For the real Baggers it's often down to the availability of meaningless bits of paper. If there's a printed match programme, it's a football game. If not, it's a kickabout. These dinosaurs are increasingly fucked as some First Team games in The Championship are now being undertaken without a programme.

For some, there has to be a turnstile, ruling out "matches in parks". For others, they won't tick games where the goals are on wheels. Again, 4G pitches have fucked that. Me. Personally. I've always worshipped at a broad church. If it says Sheffield United on the badge. If you can find the results on the FA Full Time website. Tick the hell outta it. However, just occasionally, on the far edges of CBF activity, I've seen games where there's been a Ref. But no Linesmen. And, de facto, that's where my line in the sand is.

Sure, the players are committed and trying their best. But the lino lackers, just sends the signal it's not being taken all that seriously. Not serious enough to tick. Anyway. I'll get to the point.

This North East Premier game at Handsworth had linesmen. I get to so few of these NFYL games, and of course there's no paperwork, so it's very difficult for me to keep track of who is who. I was just trying to work a few kids out, when United's number 6, essentially playing CB in a four, pushed up and hit a absolute scorcher of a left foot high past the Burnley keeper from outside the box in just the first minute. Ooofffttt.

I radar scanned around the pitch, players & celebrations to get it in my mind's eye. What? Isn't that number 6, the big lad up top celebrating with the CB number 6 who's just thunderbastarded it in? Klaxon. There's been a kit malfunction. Two number 6s out there. Oooohhhh. Maybe try to get a picture of both of them together to light up the Blog.

So. United win a corner. Up top number 6 & CB number 6 will surely both be in the box for this. Fire off lots of pics. Have a look at them later & crop the best one for shits & giggles. Which I do. Only to find there's two fucking number 5s as well !!!

Look. I've ticked it. SUFC game #29 of the season. Game 1,031 of the cumulative Blog. But, two 5s AND two 6s. Maybe that's a good indicator of whether it's being taken all that seriously.

(I think CB 6, the scorer, may have been Kieron Dodds. He politely thanked me after I'd retrieved a rogue ball from the other pitch at HT. Nice lad.)

Burnley equalised on 13 minutes. And. Wouldn't you just know it, my notes say the other number 6 (who may be Ross Dawson) scored what proved to be the winner on 22 minutes with a pick the spot left foot low drive into the bottom corner.

A scrappy game all round I felt. Not much composure happening. But thoroughly enjoyable as too well matched teams went at it hammer n tongs. That win catapults The Learning Blades above Burnley into 5th place. Played 9, won 3, drawn 2. Still sort of in touch with the leaders, Everton. But they've only played 6 & have won 5 (incidentally the one Everton lost was against us).

The post match was

Chantry Inn

400 Handsworth Rd, Handsworth, Sheffield S13 9BZ

first time I've been in since it all got rebadged by Chantry Brewery. Welcoming in a subdued way. Deffo a Local. Fellas walking in after work, "Hello Terry", two pints being pulled without asking - what you having. "Leave one in for John".

Two Chantry badged lagers on the kegs. Five of their cask on the sticks. All Cask Three English Pounds.

1 December kiddo, I'll have the Christmas Beer.

Chantry Brewery, Santas Drop, Pale Ale on Cask at 4.1%

I mean. It was lovely. But it was that famous & traditional Christmas Beer. The (checks notes) English Pale. I mean, Red Ale, Spiced Bitter, Stout innit? yer usual Festive Firkin. Anyway, very good pale.

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The Three Kit Ref

Sheffield United 2 v Southampton 2 

Southampton win 4-2 on Penalties 

EFL Cup Third Round 

Tuesday 21 September 2021 

SUFC 2021/22 Game #11 

Sheffield United Community Foundation U19 2 v Everton 1 

National Football Youth League 

North East Premier 

Wednesday 22 September 2021 

Played at Handsworth 

SUFC 2021/22 Game #12 

The Beer...

Two Thirds Beer Co, 434-436 Abbeydale Rd, Nether Edge, Sheffield S7 1FQ

are throwing Oktoberfest until October 3. And, you really should go. I won't pretend I know how Oktoberfest works. Never been. Damning it, isn't it as simple as a load of big industrial, international, conglomerate breweries in Bavaria brew some beers to an ever so slightly different recipe. Call 'em Festival Beers. And serve them in a load of circus tents. While presumably banging on about that fucking Reinheitsgebot all the time.

One off Beers you say, in tents. A lot to love there.

I should add that Two Thirds have German Street Food from Get Wurst all year around. (Get Wurst, I mean it's not Ball Sup, but as puns go, Hat Tip).

They've sourced six exclusive Oktoberfest Beers from different breweries. Got some appropriate bunting up. And the Big Drinking Glasses. Nice touch, but for Southampton at home, I'd better have Pints.

Now, I'm an Abbeydale Lad. Used to deliver The Star & Sunday Papers all round here. Sold The Green 'Un outside The Broadfield in a brief marketing experiment. Went to Heeley Baths. Went to the Abbeydale Picture House. Drank in The Temperance Bar. Before I un-saw the light I was in a Paramilitary wing of the Church Of England at St Peter's just up the hill from Two Thirds.

I mention all that just as testament to how things change over the years. Often for the better. Usually for the better. For the better. Look. This Is England. At this time of year, I'd be happy enough with a Green Hop Beer Festival. But, Stomping Ground Oktoberfest will do very nicely.

One of the beers was 4.9%, one 5.7% and the rest 6%+. As an ignoramus, I don't know what you're supposed to do. Drink 'em in a particular order. Pick one & stick to it in a show of brand loyalty. Anyway, we're the Carrier Bag Firm, we're going through the card (idc) & ticking them. 

For the time being, I steered clear of the Weiss & the Hell. I ended up with two yellow 'uns & a vaguely brown 'un.

Paulaner Oktoberfest Bier 2021 at 6%

Staatliches Hofbräuhaus München, Hofbräu Oktoberfestbier at 6.3%

Hacker-Pschorr Oktoberfestbier at 6%

They were all nice. None tasted to those abvs. Fucking dangerous if you're drinking the Big Glasses. My favourite was the Hacker-Pschorr. More amber & malty and more what I'm used to in a Märzen. It was nice & floaty & dreamy & soft. Easy drinking. But I suppose that's the point.

The Southampton game…

Enjoyable enough. Usual situation. Eleven changes. I'll again bang on about Academy Blocking. Lopata, Gordon & Brunt started v Carlisle & Derby in previous rounds. Today, Gordon played for the U23s in Cardiff. Brunt was on the bench at that one. Lopata was an unused Sub at The Lane. Now, I'm not saying it's deliberate. I'm not even saying there's anything wrong with it. But, I'm just pointing out the numbers. Davies & Hourihane & Gibbs-White & Guédioura have come in since then. To give us a bigger, full squad of experienced, Championship Ready players. And that means the Pathway that your Gordons, Brunts & Lopatas can see to the First Team is more crowded, more congested, blocked. 

They've gone from - oh I see, I'm behind him, who is behind him, then it's the other one, then it's ME. To - oh shit, and him now & another one & some old guy who couldn't get a contract anywhere else. (Again, I recognise the inevitability of this at my, and most other, clubs, that's the game). And don't give me any of that shit about - if they're good enough, they'll break through. Why bother with an Academy then? We'll just let kids come down from Graves Park on Monday mornings, have a kick about & if any of them are good enough we'll put them in the First Team on the Saturday.

Pathways get blocked.

That said, our "Midweek XI" performed well against a nominal Premier League team. Organised. Kept the number of mistakes low. Probing & inventive. And, they were able to create chances & put some away. No criticism of Ndiaye from me. He had the screaming ab dab Cramps again. But, that's just where he is as a player & his fitness & his game time. Needs miles in those bow legs. I do wonder how we're going to use him longer term. The more withdrawn and wider role he played tonight kept him out of the game for spells. Only sparking him into life occasionally. I'm not fussed. But, I'm hoping they can find a very attacking role for him as one of a two. Or immediately behind a two.

The Everton game…

A good win for the Community Foundation U19s, in the "Get Phil Out Of The House" League. They'd been hammered 9-1 away at Newcastle last week. So hopefully they'll feel back on track after a deserved win against Everton. 

Previously, I've portrayed the Community Foundation team as Pre Academy. I've since realised that's wrong. Pre Academy better describes the 12/13/14 year olds training at Shirecliffe. With a view to signing into the Academy. The Community Foundation team is more a Shadow Academy, a Parallel Academy. Kids continuing their education, under Sheffield United branding, with a proper training & game program.

I've also called it United's D Team. Behind the First Team, Under 23s and Under 18s. 

I felt today's game was a bit lower quality than games I've seen in previous seasons. A bit more punt it upfield. I presume it's difficult at the beginning of the season. Completely new squad as term time starts. Precious little time for working on systems & plans. Maybe a lot of learning on the job.

Everton took the lead on 12. But the Class Room Blades were level on 14 & ahead on 21. 

In typical Carrier Bag Firm fashion, we were more interested in the poor old Ref. He started the game in Black. Complete colour clash with Everton's mainly black away kit. He pulled an orange bib on. Helping a bit. But, the bit of Everton's kit which was not mainly black, was orange. So, now both Everton & the Ref were in Black & Orange. (Giggling here). He emerged in the second half with a bright yellow shirt. Got a lot of laundry to do this week the fella.

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A Game, Remember Them

Sheffield United Community Foundation U19 4 v Tranmere Rovers Sports Football College U19 2 

National Football Youth League North Premier Division 

Wednesday 16 December 2020 

Football With Fans Game #19 

SUFC 2020/21 GAME ONE #1 

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I fucking enjoyed that. A game featuring a United XI, at a level I'm used to & have been to before. Let's call it SUFC Futures. The lads played really well. Some great skills on display. Romped into a three nil lead at half time. But, Tranmere got back into it & United were just holding on at the end as Tranmere looked for the equaliser. On 90+5, a United breakaway, with Tranmere fully committed up top, added that fourth. Great day out.

There's a number of ways of calling that. Let's be positive. Let's call that United's D Team. The A Team play in the Premier League. B play in the U23 Professional Development League. C play in the U18 Professional Development League. And, then there's these varmints playing in the National Football Youth League (North Premier). These are College Kids. Studying under the banner of the Sheffield United Community Foundation, Football & Education Academy.

Doing BTECs/Diplomas/Foundation Degrees/etc in Sports/Science/Coaching/etc. And with a proper, full on, football fixture list against kids linked to other football clubs. You get a qualification. And a United kit & badge to play in on a Wednesday. Living the dream. That's the fucking club right there. No contract hold outs. No shall we break the wage structure. No new strikers in the January Window. No fucking NOISE. Eleven v Eleven. Kids. Dreaming. Inject it into my veins right after the Covid-19 Vaccine.

The National Football Youth League attempts to bridge the gap between, on the one hand, College football &, on the other hand, Professional Club Academy football. It provides a pathway into professional football. Today, I've seen the lad, who is trying to be Antwoine Hackford, so he can be Zak Brunt, so he can be Regan Slater, so he can be Rhian Brewster, so he can be Billy Sharp. Yes, that lad. 

A pathway for lads like Joseph Bacon who, in September, was asked to step up from this team and train with Del Geary and the U18 Academy lads at Shirecliffe. 

Over the years, sixty young 'uns who played in the National Football Youth League went on to sign professional terms. Including ex Blade John Brayford, who played in the NFYL under the Burton Albion Community programs. And including ex Blade Academy Graduate CJ Hamilton, who played in the NFYL under the Watford Community programs. The Poster Boy & League Ambassador for the NFYL is Britt Assombalonga. After being binned out at Nottingham Forest, Britt got a place on Watford's Education & Football scheme & played for Watford in the NFYL. Eventually successfully trialling for Watford's Academy & signing pro terms. More recently, Britt (a Congolese International) played over 100 games for 'Boro.

Right. Dear reader. I now need you to look away while I personally address the Carrier Bag Firm, who are currently bored shitless reading all these #FACTS.

NO, there weren't any fucking teamsheets. Get a life……

For the Civilians who are still with me, that means I can only explain today's game by shirt numbers. Not by names unfortunately. I was whoooopily impressed by the quality on display. Both teams were well organised & comfortable on the ball. ALWAYS looking to play rather than hot potato get rid. Long balls were invariably at channel runners rather than hopeful Hail Mary's. In the first half particularly, United were really mixing it up. Happy to play through the midfield (shoutout #4) & link up to the forwards. Happy to play to feet outside. Happy to run with the thing & come inside & make you exclaim gloriously "where's he fucking off to now" (shoutout #2).

He's my striker, he's my Number #9, scored at both ends of the game. Superb on 2 minutes, great with both feet. He got the ball inside right, came across the defender towards the penalty spot, and knocked it in left footed. On 90+5, with the Birkenheadites chasing the equaliser, #9 capitalised on a bit of space, and a bit of a defensive kerfuffle to seal it with the fourth.

His consecutive numbered mucker #10 also looked a ticket. Playing slightly withdrawn, he was very effective. He scored United's second on 23 minutes. But, got a real belter on 35. #10 started the move, sweeping it out inch perfect into space wide left. A decent enough ball into the mixer, #9 turned it into a bit of pinball. And Tenny, arriving a bit later, but right on time, hit it home. My notes say, and I proclaim - a number of times, #10 hits a perfectly weighted ball to……

Really, up until minute 55, United were well on top. I don't know what it was, I don't think they ran out of steam, but slowly, monkey catching style, the Warriors from The Wirral got back into it. More possession, a few chances. Three one on 56. Three two on 72. And, here we go for that classic finish.

But. Now. A reality check in what has inevitably been a stop start NFYL season. That, fairly convincing performance, was the first win in seven games for these Classroom Blades. They've conceded FIVE (v Burnley), SIX twice (v Newcastle United & v Barnsley) and EIGHT v Carlisle United. Mad League. Some teams have played 2, some 9. That win puts United 9th of 12. For what it's worth.

A great day deserves a great beer. The pubs are shut, where've you been?

The selected tin is:

Verdant Brewing Co x DEYA Brewing Company

Degrees, Double IPA, Amarillo & Loral Hops in the whirlpool, double dry hopped with Citra & Simcoe, coming in at 8%.

Just the right amount of juice. Steers well clear of sticky & cloying. Man, it doesn't taste up to it's 8. That's dangerous. Not bittered into oblivion. Easily drinkable. Great balance. A classic put you to sleeper. Dreaming of a Pathway to the First Team.

Stats

I have now Blogged from 936 games in 2,311 days

NB - these line ups added at a later date to the original Blog