You Can't Hide With A Bandaged Head

Sheffield Collegiate CC 167 for 8 

beat 

Hallam CC 142 all out 

by 25 runs 

Yorkshire South Premier League 

Jack Bland Trophy 

Western Group 

Played at Abbeydale Park, Sheffield 

Monday 31 August 2020 

Maltby Main 2 v Handsworth 1 

FA Cup Extra Preliminary Round 

Tuesday 1 September 2020 

Twitter @ball_sup 

www.twitter.com/ball_sup 

Untappd ball_sup 

Right. It's September. If you've already had a game with a 150 limit. You're allowed 300 now. Woo. And indeed. Hoo. Maltby announced the crowd as 293. 

Right. It's September. That means (checks notes) the FA Cup. Competitive. Football.

Right. It's Competitive Football. That means the Sheffield United Carrier Bag Firm are FULLY REPPING. I didn't do a full audit. But, I've noted the names of eight CBF at that game. Plus one Chelsea. Naturally, the CBF exchange information. Naturally, as the Chronicler of the Carrier Bag Firm, I capture the most extreme bits of that information for this posterity Blog.

For instance. Are you aware that there is a Facebook Group dedicated to taking & posting pictures of Corner Flags? The Corner Flag Cornucopia Group. Surely, this is the content you're here for.

Right. It's September. It's Competitive Football. The CBF are busting the seams of Muglet Lane. Surely, the FA Cup itself is here as we begin - The Road To Wembley. Well …. sort of. My new acquaintance John from Maltby jointly owns replicas of the Premier League Trophy, The Champions League Trophy. And, natch, a replica of the FA Cup. All bought off eBay. (I know….)

Tonight. Their replica of the FA Cup is front & centre as you squeeze through the turnstile. You can have your photo with it for One Maltby Pound. It's fair to say - it's all going on tonight.

Right. Let's zoom to the end. Ten man Maltby were a goal down going into the last 5 mins. And, won two one. Did I mention the FA Cup yet?

The game changed on 43 minutes. There had been the usual criticism of the referee. Me. Personally. I'm against it. But, this game MATTERED to the players, staff & fans. So, if they think he's got it wrong they'll go after him/her. I was just jotting down the latest comment aimed by a player at the frankly petite & young looking ref after another moody decision.

"Stop arguing with the Ref, he's only eighteen"

As my titters were subsiding, an off the deck, the lot going in, tackle by Maltby's Luke Fletcher had us all wincing on the Cricket Field Side. Now, I need to explain. Number 11, Luke Fletcher had already been off the field for 5 minutes. Having extensive treatment for a cut to his yet to be lost head. He'd had to switch his blood stained shirt for Number 18. And, he'd got the full Terry Butcher, Horror Movie bandage wrapped around his noggin. Anyway. Bang. He's put that tackle in. Handsworth have surrounded the Ref. There is shoving. And the inevitable pushing. Luke gets himself out of there. No point getting further involved. Jogs to the other side of the penalty area. Still a mayhem of pointing & shouting over the far side. The Ref consults The Lino. I imagine the conversation went;

"Who was it?"

"Him, are you sure?"

"We don't want to send the wrong guy off"

"How can it be 18, there isn't an 18 on the sheet?"

The Lino, now a bit frustrated….

"Yes, him with the big fucking bandage on who you can't miss"

Red. Ten Men. Handsworth scored on the hour. A corner swung over. A lot of bodies in there. And Sam Smith half headed, half bundled the ball into the bottom corner. But, with the possibility of going out of the Cup, with a replica of the Cup owned by two Maltbytesers looking on.. It was all Maltby from then. 

Riveting. You couldn't take your eyes off it. Both the equaliser & the winner had a similar feel to them. Were they shots? Were they crosses? Either way. Handsworth keeper should deal with them. But, it's Maltby in the Velvet Bag. (Actually, not true, Preliminary Round Draw already made - Newark at home)

The drink was actually Cricket Cans at Abbeydale Park the day before. I'm getting to the end of the three for a fiver Tesco Bangers.

Vocation Brewery, Pride & Joy, Pale Ale at 5.3%

Thoroughly enjoyable. Suits sitting in the old folding chair, as the cricket unfolds in front of you. Gentle tangerine Fanta. Into healthy, lengthy bitterness.

Stats

I have now Blogged from 922 games in 2,205 days