'Gus With The Re-Ups

Sussex 181 for 8 

beat Middlesex 177 for 5 

by 4 runs 

T20 Blast, South Group 

Thursday 8 June 2023 

Played at Lord's 

Hampshire Hawks 164 for 6 

beat Middlesex 159 for 7 

by 5 Runs 

T20 Blast, South Group 

Tuesday 6 June 2023 

Played at Radlett 

Two single digit defeats for Middlesex in short order. As I write, played 8, lost 8. Deary me. Not for the first time, beer saved the evening at Radlett. Courtesy of Vinny & Ted. A bar & bottleshop in Chalfont St Peter. I know Vinny is the geezer. I spoke to him. I think Ted may be his dog. And, I understand Tim Murtagh (current Middlesex player and former Ireland Test player) and Angus Fraser (former Middlesex player & managing director of cricket & former England Test player) are co-owners of Vinny & Ted.

Anyway, Vinny & Ted had a gazebo on the boundary at Radlett. Knocking out three keg craft & a cider. The lager offering was (obvs) Lost & Grounded, Helles. I walked over for one of them for my comrade. But, it'd gone off. Vinny explained;

"We're trying to get another lager sorted, we don't know what it'll be, but it won't be Lost & Grounded."

As I returned along the boundary with aleternatives, two fellas were walking towards me carrying a full keg of the lager replacement swaying between them. (I think it might have been Frontier Lager). One of the keg karriers was Angus Fraser.

Let's recap. A craft beer gazebo on the boundary. Part owned by present & former Middlesex & International players. With Angus Fraser responsible for re-ups. Now. Eight losses out of eight is piss poor. But, looking at it another way, that's how to run a fucking cricket club!!!

Vinny and Ted, The Long Hop, English Hopped Pale Ale on Keg at 4.5%

Brewed at, and in collaboration with Neckstamper Brewing in E10. Cascade and Jester. Nice n Hoppy. Bit of peachy weachy stuff. Bitterness grows, but stays in the easy drinking closet.

Neckstamper Brewing, Vinny's Bitter on Keg at 4%

Maybe that is a venue specific re-badge. Not too sweet. Good whack of nutty stuff. Nice growing bitterness. Not many keg bitters around. Good 'un this.

Ben McDermott drove Hants forward with a 34 ball 47. He was third out at 94 for 3 off 11.3. Middlesex looked to be right back in it. As that triggered 3 wickets for 11. Leaving Hants at 105 for 5. From there, 164 didn't look too bad. Luke Holman took 2 for 12 off 3 overs. 

But, what a fucking start MCCC had. Two for two at the end of two. And those two were both leg byes. Both openers gone quacking. John Turner making his Hampshire debut. Took a wicket with his first and sixth balls. On his way to 3 for 30 off his full four.

But, Max Holden (53) & Ryan Higgins (43) got Middlesex back in it. Hampshire death bowling was superb though. And killed it off.

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Mostly, Mason Crane

Yorkshire 243 

v Hampshire 163 

Yorkshire 312 for 6 declared 

Hampshire 177 for 9 

Match Drawn 

County Championship Division 1 

Thursday 2 September 2021 

Played at Southampton 

I'm not quite sure what to make of this place

Coop Micro Bar, 5 Lower Northam Rd, Hedge End, Southampton SO30 4FN

(pronounced coop as in loop, I asked them)

Under current Carrier Bag Firm regulations, that is perfectly doable from the Ageas Bowl. It's under the 30mins walking requirement. In a reasonably busy locale, with the chance of an Uber. It's a single, shop front bar. A Greggs one side & a kebab shop the other (giggling here). Ten pukka kegs. And Corona on draft as the normal lager.

I tried six of the ten. Not a bad one amongst. So, I hear you ask, why in two minds Phil?

Well. Because I didn't have a superb one either. Five of the Ten were from the same single brewery. And you'd struggle to find any real difference between five of the Pales & NE IPAs I tried. And, the sixth, a Czech style pilsner was just ordinary. The whole shebang just lacking variety basically.

And. The service was fine. Nice & friendly & helpful. But. The pace of the place was run by those fucking computerised tills & tablets. Every beer ordered ran the same pattern. I knew what I wanted. Picked off the screens in the bar. Ordered by Number & Name. The bar staff knew what I wanted. The taps were right there on the back wall. But, every order was met with - take a seat, it'll be a minute or two, I'll bring it over. Because, they then had to pfaff around on the technology - swipe left, swipe right, search engine, tap, tap, tap to find the fucking thing in cyberspace and put it through the till. Wait for a little ticket to come out of a machine. So that they could read the fucking order I'd placed 2 minutes ago. And then make a little queue of tickets on the bar. Aaarrrggghhh.

Tap It Brewing Co, Judas, Pilsner on Keg at 4.5%

Tap It Brewing Co, Dialling In, New England Pale on Keg at 4.8%

Little Monster Brewing Co, Better In Blue, IPA on Keg at 5.2%

Tap It Brewing Co, Interstella, New England IPA on Keg at 5.2%

Tap It Brewing Co, Nipper, New England IPA on Keg at 5.6%

Little Monster Brewing Co, Manaaki, New England IPA on Keg at 6.5%

(Recovering) on balance that place is a PLUS. In what is basically a beer desert anywhere near the ground, we now have a target.

And. Seamless. Yorkshire also eventually set Hampshire a target late on Day 3. Chase 393 lads. We all do our own calculations don't we. Basically, no one is going to declare at Tea anymore. Because - if Ballance can bat, stay in, and score on this, so can Vince. A 121 stand between Hill & Tom Kohler-Cadmore. Tom was third out (for 89) at 206 (off 73.6). He'd done the hard graft, but once the hammer came down, he got out. The set up seemed to take an age. Hants were two bowlers short. Dawson was chucking it into the rough outside leg stump. Nine boundary fielders. I felt Yorkshire should have taken it on there. Do the opposite of what your opponent expects. And, once there are enough runs on, put the gun on to have a shot before close. But it drifted a bit if I'm honest. Just 68 in 31 overs in the morning. And only 27 in the first 19 overs of the middle session. Then 183 runs off 25 overs either side of Tea. Spread it out a bit is what I'm saying……

Ballance did the damage with an 85 ball Century. Seven leg side sixes. 

Alsop & Holland went before close. So what do I know?

Day Four went all the way. Because of the format of the Championship this year, it sort of felt like Yorkshire had to win to have a chance at the Title. An all on the line day. Which we couldn't get over the line. I can't really say I can point to anything Yorkshire did wrong. The declaration left 'em with a good whack with the New Ball from Tea. The light went & Bess & Lyth had to tandem at the end. But, mostly, Mason Crane. Night Watchman late on Day Three. Batted for 250 minutes. Best part of 200 balls. For a superb 28 runs. Vince matched him. 151 balls for 42. 

The following two nine on the boundary vs ten round the bat pics tell the story.

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Define Explicable

Yorkshire 243 

v Hampshire 163 

Yorkshire 34 for 1 

County Championship Division 1 

Close on Day Two

Tuesday 31 August 2021 

Played at Southampton 

A great day of cricket. And a great position for Yorkshire. A lead of 114. Just one wicket down (Lyth, sigh). With the conditions and the pitch, both sides clearly still in it. But a lead's a lead. 

The most frustrated I got was the last dozen overs of the Hants innings. Mason Crane was out to Thompson at 123 for 9. The lead then was 120. Hampshire had only just made half of Yorkshire's score. Abbott & Wheal chipped away. Chip. Chip. Four byes to start Dom Bess's 18th over, and take the lead below 100 pissed me off Royally. An 8 run, including four more fucking byes, 62nd over brought the lead down to just 81.

Anyone within my earshot was left in no doubt. All the hard work is being undone here. Phheeww. Wheal went just three balls & one run later.

Jordan Thompson had initially gone wicketless at 6 an over. James Vince cracking three fours off his third over to take it to 61 for 3.

Masterstroke Patto brought Thompson back for the 39th over. He conceded just five off 3, including a Maiden. Then he had a lovely three wickets in 22 balls spell to rip it all back. 

Earlier in the Day, Vince had got to a run every two balls 49. You could see from the field placings, that Yorkshire were trying to put pressure on him. Come on mate. Do you want this fifty or not? He faced ten balls on 49. At t'other end, Alsop faced 12 balls, with only one scoring shot. All that discipline paid off. Vince inexplicably played a hoik off The Fish, top edge, George Hill making a deal of ground to catch it "comfortably" in the end.

Inexplicably you say? Inexplicably? You've just explained he'd been locked down for TEN BALLS. Phil, that's the definition of explicable.

As the clock ticked past twenty to seven, I was cheering every wicketless ball to the rafters as Hill & Kohler-Cadmore brought it to the end of the day.

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Embrace The Dimensions

Yorkshire 197 for 6 

v Hampshire 

County Championship Division 1 

Close on Day One 

Monday 30 August 2021 

Played at Southampton 

A grey, overcast, chilly at times day. Pitch looked greeeeen. Hants won the Toss & banged us in. I want to say - so different from Test Cricket, which is played in the English Summer months of June, July & August. But of course, in the current ECB schedule, we've still got two Tests to come.

Cricket has many dimensions. That's one of the reasons they've created The Hundred. To REDUCE the dimensions. To put Clear Blue Water between old cricket & the new broom. What we really ought to be doing is embracing the dimensions. Today that was very, very different to an evening at The Hundred.

But, still an absorbing day. I'm not saying it was hooping around. I'm not saying it was pacy & bouncy. But, I'm sure it was a very challenging time for the batsmen. Forget the runs. Forget the balls faced. Let's have a look at the times. George Hill (123 mins), Tom K-C (144 mins), Gary Ballance (154 mins) all batted for over two hours. Dom Bess came back through the Fire Doors of the Hotel not out for 101 mins. 

OK. OK. None of them have put mammoth scores up. But, none of them have thought - fuck it, one's coming soon, I'll have a dart.

Sixty for One at Din Dins looked a superb platform. George Hill was 31 not out, having been watchful, but putting away the bad balls (6 x 4s). But, he got out to the first ball after lunch. Ballance came in then and held it together for a long time. Eventually gone for 42 at 138 for 5. I'll admit, when Duke shuffled off at 159 for 6, I felt a lot of the earlier work had been undone. Five more gone for less than a hundred.

Bess & Thompson steadied & then pushed. The New Ball was taken. But after six overs of squinting to see that under the floodlights, Middlebrook & Llong brought 'em off.

Ian Holland, supposedly batting at Two for Hampshire had the ridiculous figures of 11 overs, 9 maidens, 0 for 8 runs. Great back story the fella. Born Stevens Point, Wisconsin, USA (UK passport via English Dad). In 2012, he entered Cricket Superstar. An Australian X Factor style reality TV show. The role of Simon Cowell was played by former AUS Captain Allan Border. Ian H won it. The Prize? A contract with Cricket Victoria at the MCG. He ended up making just one appearance in the Sheffield Shield. Eventually pinging up at Fleetwood CC up on the Lancashire Coast. From where, he was recommended to Hampshire by former England allrounder Dimitri Mascarenhas.

Cool story Bro. But 9 maidens off 11 overs is cooler.

A lot is said about the logistical problems of the Southampton ground. Stuck out by the M27. The Carrier Bag Firm preference is always to stay near the ground. And to try & make the Beer work from there. Challenging.

We had a ridic early start via London Waterloo, Hedge End station and the 8 CITY RED bus. You'll recall the 8 is supposed to call at the Cricket Ground only when there is a game on. The Bus Driver a. didn't know there was a game on and b. didn't know the turn off for the ground nor how to get back to the main road. The CBF "inbuilt cricket SatNav", always happy to help.

Anyway, after all that, we decided to stay home for a Beer at the, frankly fraying, Hilton Hotel at the ground. The Maitre d' admitted they were having a lot of difficulty getting staff. The more relaxed and informal café bar was shut because of that. 

In the main bar, there were three CraftALike Taps.

Craft Academy (Greene King), Over Easy, Session IPA 3.8%

Greene King, Ice Breaker Pale Ale 4.5%

But they were both OFF. And….

Greene King, Yardbird Pale Ale at 4%

The first pull was flat & got flatter. Why don't barstaff just look at what they're serving. I nursed it & moaned. Next fella up got a foaming one in the branded glass. I put mine on the bar next to his "sorry, something has gone wrong, I want one like that".

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Rain in Vain

Yorkshire 181 all out
Hampshire 235 all out
Yorkshire 332 for 5 declared
Hampshire 158 for 5
Match Drawn

County Championship Division One
Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, 27, 28, 29 May 2019
(Didn't attend Day 4)

Played at Headingley

2018/19 Brewery Visits - 104

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I think you could put that one down as a rain affected draw. Unfortunately, I couldn't make Day 4, which had shaped up into a bit of turning point cricket. Yorkshire batted on until twenty to three before getting at Hampshire. And had 'em at 38 for three an hour later when they took Tea. A few clusters of wickets might have made for a v exciting finish. But, it wasn't to be.

I can't remember being at a more on, off, repeat rain delay day than Day 1.

We seem to be specialising in low first digs, concede a good bit of a lead, but bat long in our second & put the other lot under pressure. Just 44 & 15 for the opening stand. Kohler-Cadmore, batting at four, in at 50-2 & 20-2. Ballance's ton was the standout in our second. He put on 141 with TKC & 78 with Leaning. All in rain vain.

The beer I'll mention was the superb Collab betwixt Thornbridge & Kirkstall, Ventura Highway, West Coast style IPA, on keg at 6.8% in the Arcadia.

Excellent. Lots of apricot, peach, the lot. That stays all the way. The bitterness helps it all out. Spot on.

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I have now Blogged from 809 games in 1,744 days

Blades AnAleyTicks

Millwall 2 v Sheffield United 3
The Championship
Saturday 29 September 2018

Sheffield United 3 v Preston North End 2
The Championship
Saturday 22 September 2018

Sheffield United 0 v Birmingham City 0
The Championship
Wednesday 9 September 2018

Yorkshire 184 all out
v Hampshire 79 for 5
close on Day 1
County Championship Division One
Tuesday 18 September 2018
Played at Headingley

SUFC 2018/19 Games 25, 26 & 27

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Lots of people are at it now. At last. Numbers. Statistics. Expected this that other Models. One of my jobs before the Carrier Bag Firm became a profitable going concern involved me calculating the Inflation Price Index for Tristan da Cunha. A remote group of islands in the South Atlantic. You'll hear lots of rhetoric about how official statistics are fixed. Made up even. But, come on, you might not know me from Eve. But who would you really want to be in charge of Retail Price Indices for a South Atlantic Archipelago. Free choice. If ever a job was made for the Carrier Bag Firm, that is it. Hand. In. Glove.

I'm a numbers guy. Everyone's getting an angle. I need one. Welcome to the trial edition of Blades AnAleyTicks. Mate, you've been Punned.

Millwall away. A Saturday. I've looked at the expectations. I've looked at the reality. Poor performance that. Many of the worst aspects of our recent seasons.

The Plan. I collated the Scouting Reports. The maximum number of expected Breweries on the day was EIGHTEEN. Brockley Brewing Co was the last target. But, that closes at 9pm. So, that always looked unlikely. Fourpure Brewing Co is effectively under South Bermondsey station. Opens 11am to 8pm. Under normal circumstances that's very very doable. But, we had to run & re-run the model and check the parameters. Fucking 100% owned by Australian Beverage Bollocks Co, Lion. In turn owned by Kirin. Big. Fucking. Beer. We had 16 others to go at. Big Beer can go to the end of the list. File under - gratuitous pisstake sneer at them Brewery Tick.

That revised our xBT (expected Brewery Ticks) to SIXTEEN. Our actual, final total was a Piss Poor ELEVEN. Just 69% Completion Rate.

What went wrong. Team selection was partly to blame. Two bona fide Carrier Baggers. Plus Two Fellow Travellers on a One Match Trial. One FT can only drink pints. Doesn't like low abv beers. Doesn't like high abv beers. Really only likes dark beers. Finds hopped beers sour (FFS - Amateur Hour). He won't have Tasters. It's beneath him. His eyesight is too poor to read the Beer Blackboards. He can sometimes read pump clips if he gets four inches away from them & squints. And, he won't wear glasses.  So, he'll routinely end up with a beer he didn't ask for & he doesn't really like. He also has very poor BM (Bladder Management). On a run which will often involve portaloos or single, unisex traps.

Because this is a full on AnAleyTicks Blog, it helps to categorise events & personnel. He is a Fucking Liability.

How good was the Plan. Everyone has a plan, until they get punched in the mouth. (Quote attributed to Mike Tyson). The first punch was at Anspach & Hobday. The Scouting Report said open at 1030. The sign on the door said 1100. The locked shutters effectively confirmed that. We Recalibrated. The sign on the door at Southwark Brewing also said 1100. But, the second punch in the mouth came fast. Boooom. The staff arrived to open Southwark Brewing up. But, with a big bunch of apparently random keys. And a raft of locks, bolts, padlocks to keep the Bad South Londonarians out. They could not open the doors. (This Blog now pauses while I go for a lie down in a darkened room).

We were told The Florence in Herne Hill no longer had what you would call a recognisable Brew Kit. And. Nail. Coffin. I'd already ordered the beers in Brick Brewery, Peckham Rye before I had a quick shufty at the geography. A quick word with the bar person confirmed. It's not actually a Brewery. When you're Brewery Ticking, that's usually a requirement.

The Positives. Many. We were patient at times. Wait. Wait. Wait. Build again. Aaahhh. They've found the square key for the square lock at Southwark Brewing. And ….. we're in.

We adapted very well in running, as the ticking progressed. Shit. The Florence is not a Brewery any more. Don't worry, we hadn't realised Bullfinch was so close until we spoke to the Brewer at Clarkshaws. Nix The Florence. Hit Bullfinch.

We hit a wall at Gipsy Hill Brewing. That, plus Southey Brewing in Penge would have put us on THIRTEEN. It was already Too Late For Brockley (note to self - possible name for South London musical, something, something, something, Too Late For Brockley, the Songs Of Squeeze - needs work).

The Blackboards at Gipsy Hill were very difficult for any of us to read. I ordered Beatnik. That was off. The female bar person walked away to talk to someone at the end of the bar. The male bar person was engrossed with his phone. Maybe five feet away from me. No amount of “excuse mes” got me anywhere. I was Eleven Breweries in. The clock was ticking. He got the full - OY - treatment. Wouldn't serve us. We needed to wait for his female colleague. While he did Fuck All. I thought, well if he's getting his Social Media in order, so will I. I made to take a picture of the Beer Blackboards for Twitter, Instagram & Untappd. Both of them suddenly got the idea I was taking pictures of them. That should not be a problem anyway. It's 2018 Daddio. I thrust my phone at them offering them a look at the Gallery. Full of pictures of Beer Boards. Empty of pictures of them. They wouldn't have it. And we were asked to leave the broadly empty gaff. Without having a drink. I minced out like a good 'un.

Gipsy Hill can happily have the piss poor, unwelcoming Brewery Tap experience award. I will mention them in my acceptance speech at next year's Beer Geek Awards.

The Best Brewery Of The Day can go to Brew By Nos.

I'm not awarding an Outstanding Beer Of The Day. When you're plotting 18 Breweries, believe me abv matters. I'm awarding a Genre Of The Day & shouting out to all those superb low abv Pales & IPAs. No compromise on flavour.

The Kernel, Table Beer at 2.9%
Southwark Brewing Co, All Day Breakfast at 3.4%
Brew By Nos, 27 01 Double Dry Hopped Table Pale, Eldorado & Citra at 3.5%
Bianca Road, Long Play IPA at 3.6%
Canopy Beer Co, Love Walks Small at 2.9%
Bullfinch, Juno (Amarillo) at 2.8%

Looking at those abvs, it's a surprise we were so hammered that they wouldn't serve us in Gipsy Hill Brewing. (note - we weren't)

Let the record show. 18 in the plan. One off as wouldn't be reached in time. One off as now Big Industrial Chemical Plant Beer. One no longer brewing. One just a bar, not a Brewery. Two nixed in timetable shake up. One added opportunistically. Binned out of one (snigger). One just a Brewery too far.

The Kernel (off sales only - took the cap off & drank it walking to the next one - we are savages), Southwark Brewing, Anspach & Hobday, Brew By Nos, Bianca Road Brew Co, Affinity Brew Co, Spartan Brewery, Partizan Brewing, Clarkshaws Brewing, Canopy Beer Co, Bullfinch Brewery. The First XI.

722/1502

All we have is Beer

Yorkshire 350 all out
v Hampshire 443 all out
Yorkshire 91-2
close on Day 3

County Championship Division One
(Pink Ball, Day/Night)

Played at Southampton

Friday 22 June 2018

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Gypsy Hill Brewing Co Hepcat Hepcat, Double IPA from a tin at 7.5%.
Lots of upfront bitterness. Off an orange/peach sweetness. The balance is spot on. Sweet comes. Bitter comes - rich & intense.

Almasty Brewing Co Double IPA from a tin at 8%.
I'm not a big fan of that. It's got a sharp back of throat bitterness. But the flavours just sit & don't go anywhere. A bit disappointed.

676/1403

1020 for 1400

Yorkshire 350 all out
v Hampshire 245-3
close on Day 2

County Championship Division One
(Pink Ball, Day/Night)

Played at Southampton

Thursday 21 June 2018

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Hitherto, I've been relaxed about the Pink Ball experiments in The Champo. But, selfishly, it plays hell with your routine. Particularly if you're a Blogger. You don't really feel like writing the Blog at 2145pm after play has finished. But, also, how are you supposed to get a drink in? Lots of the MicroBreweries & Micropubs only open at weekends & evenings. You're left scrabbling around for bits n bobs until about 1315pm - and then a mad dash to the ground.

We went across the M27 to the supermarket on Day 1 - to get the picnic for the room. I may have misunderstood. But, some poor Hampshire Sod. Seat cushion under his arm. Bag over his shoulder. Striding with a purpose. Towards the gates. Maybe 1020am. For a 1400pm start. I may have misunderstood. But, I’m calling that - he didn't realise it was an afternoon start. Poor Sod.

Anyway. I’ve outplanned 'em. Magic Rock Tins.
Un-Human Cannonball, Triple IPA at 11% (eleven). Nice sweetness. The hop bitterness is rich, but I expected it to be thicker n chewy. It's a bit messy & the flavours all come at once.

So, the winner was…
Human Cannonball, Double IPA at 9.2%. Lots of lovely hoppy bitterness right upfront. Rich & intense. Long, long finish. The sugar is in there - but indiscernible. Great beer.

675/1402

That is not Normal Lager

Yorkshire 315-7
v Hampshire
close on Day 1

County Championship Division One
(Pink Ball, Day/Night)

Played at Southampton

Wednesday 20 June 2018

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Common Rooms, Southampton

A great two rooms, one bar front Craft Beer Bar in Southampton. Got a slightly too cool for school thing going on. Video games, that sort of caper. But, a great beer range. A couple on cask (and some empty handles). Keg fonts on the bar & on the wall behind the bar. And a lovely can & bottle stocked set of fridges.

To give you an idea - if you wanted/needed “Normal Lager”, you were offered either Siren, Santo IPL or an Electric Bear/Red Cat, Water Lane IPL. Loving their work.

I actually had that Siren, Santo on keg at 5% as it was part of a Burger & Pint Meal Deal while the football was on. It was very nice. Not dirty enough, nor hoppy enough for my personal taste. But, ticked a lot of boxes. Full of flavour. Some sugar, and a good bitter hit.

674/1401

Out in a Crisis

Hampshire 348 for 9
beat Yorkshire Vikings 241 all out
by 107 runs

One Day Cup Semi Final

Played at Southampton

Monday 18 June 2018

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And another YCCC Lord's Final dream lies in tatters. On the day, Yorkshire were outplayed, outgunned. James Vince faced over 40% of the balls bowled at Hampshire. He came in at 76 for two. He was out in the 46th at 313 for 6. With 171.

If someone scores like that, someone has to do something similar in the chase. Or at least two have to go big. Or you're outgunned. We were. Six Sixes were pummeled in the Hampshire innings. None by the Yorkies. Yorkshire hit 19 fours. Vince hit 20 fours.

Steyn & Chris Wood kept it very tight up top. Got us at 73 for four in the 16th.

Look. I'll take all the England stealing our players bollocks. But, Lyth, Ballance, Pujara, Kohler-Cadmore. They're all gone. With just 73 on. If you look at the sides put out. We're a batting side. And, they have to click. Or you're gone. We gone.

County Cricket is mad, getting madder. No money in it. So it has to rely on financial cross pollination from the International Game (plus others). That means England Stalwarts are pulled. But, England are pony in Red Ball & want to win White Ball Cups. So, up n comers are pulled for the Lions. Everyone is desperate to do something, anything for Test Cricket. So, there's mad games, out of schedule, v Ireland, v Afghanistan, v etc. So, Overseas Pros are pulled in out & shaking it all about. If the IPL come calling - you guessed it - Pulled. There are excuses. But, come at it from the other direction. List them. That looks like a Club In Crisis.

Rashid turns his back on the Red Ball
Plunkett & Willey get late IPL calls
Billy Stanlake is pulled by Australia
Pujara pisses off to play Afghanistan
Williamson is coming then, no then, no wait
Ballance is having a rest
New Captain Patto mid season
Denison fined & banned
Ou est Rafiq

There's a lot going on mate.

673/1399

Achieving Water Cooler

Middlesex 136 all out (19.1 overs)
lost to
Hampshire 137 for 4 (17.3 overs)
by 6 wickets

T20 Blast Southern Group

Played at Lord’s

Thursday 3 August 2017

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Let’s start with the good news. A crowd of 22,822 in Lord’s tonight. I’ll say it again. To be successful in terms of bums on seats, T20 needs to have a sense of occasion. People go because it’s the place to go. You go because your mates go. You go because your next door neighbours go. That is the Holy Grail that is being chased. It is what Big Bash t20 has achieved in Australia. It is what our American Cousins would call a Water Cooler Event. The next day, at work, stood around the water cooler, everyone is all “oohh did you go to the cricket last night….”

My bias is. The smaller, non Test Match Counties achieve Water Cooler because there are few other events to challenge T20. Your Tauntons. Your Chelmsfords. Your Worcesters. Big places. No League football. T20 is by default The Event. Salute the Sold Out Signs.

My bias is. The London grounds. Lord’s & The Oval. Achieve Water Cooler because they are in London. Old University chums, their husbands & wives, people from their golf club, their kids & school friends, the Network. All hoovering up Rover Tickets for the new Warner Stand, The Tavern & the Upper Allen. Raid Waitrose. Raid Selfridge’s Food Hall. Raid the Wine Cellar. Get yourselves down to Lord’s on a Thursday.

Up at six thirty. Check the markets. Try & wash last night’s hangover out of your hair. Into your City Office. Four screens in front of you. Buy. Sell. “Were you in the Braying Buffoon last night?”. Buy. Sell. “That new Wine Bar does Champers for under a ton”. Buy. Sell. “Have you checked out the new guy in overseas derivatives with the blue suit & beard?”. Buy. Sell. “What you doing tonight? We’re going to get half pissed at the Cricket at The Oval. Couple of Taxis booked for five downstairs”. “Yep, I’ll have loads of that….”.

My bias is. Headingley. Old Trafford. Edgbaston. Trent Bridge. They’ll have their moments. Game Of Roses, etc. But, you’ve got football, you’ve got International Cricket. You’re not London. Achieving Water Cooler is never going to be easy. I personally don’t think new ECB Franchised T20 will change that landscape much. But, I’m biased.

In other good news. I’m still ploughing through my BrewDog Hazy Jane free Equity For Punks loyalty tins at 7.2%. So, those were my drink of the day.

That was actually quite a flat and disappointing game. Afridi pulled out. He’s always worth a look. The Middle Saxons seemed to lose wickets consistently. Some good knocks. But no one really taking it downtown & home. Only one six. 135 for 7 to 136 all out hasn’t helped. And then, Hampshire just looked in control. A sixty from Roussow anchoring them. They didn’t lose wickets. And brought it home easily. But, the 22,822 were there. At The Event. That is a marvellous crowd.

515/1080

Frustrating

Yorkshire 282 all out
v Hampshire 222 all out
Yorkshire 283-5 declared
Hampshire 84-4
Match Drawn

Saturday 3 September 2016

County Championship Division 1

Played at The Ageas Bowl

Twitter @ball_sup

Vocation, Pride & Joy from a can at 5.3%. In all formats. That is a lovely beer. But, it seems very suitable for cans. Don't know why. Don't know where. Just trusting the old taste buds.

Difficult to see how Yorkshire could have done any of that differently. Other than the old chestnut take more wickets quickly. I'm sure there'll be lots of chatter about taking the weather forecast into account. The truncated third day has dented them.

All you can really do is plan it from 1059 on Day 4. Make it safe. Get them in. In time to bowl them out if one or two bowlers play out of their skin. We had them wobbling at 4 down. But, bad light & rain curtailed the day.

366/774

Chuck science at it

Yorkshire 282 all out
v Hampshire 222 all out
Yorkshire 143-2
close on Day 3

Friday 2 September 2016

County Championship Division 1

Played at The Ageas Bowl

Twitter @ball_sup

You can't do owt about the weather. It's England. It's September. Or any other month. It rains. Worry about what you can control.

As it happens, they were off for the light mainly. At a ground with floodlights.Yes I know. Part of me says we'll just have to live with where we are. Part of me says chuck some science at it. I've considered the problem.

Here are the must haves.

1. Floodlights which conform to a set standard. So that we never go off because the lights are shit. Maybe I'm crazy, but I assume we already have those.

2. Better worded regulations. All this enhancing the natural light bollocks. Say it like it is. Plain English. Then we'll all know what we're up against. If it's as simple as “even with the lights on, if, in the opinion of the Umpires the conditions for the players viewing the ball….” Then say that. The Umps choreograph the game. That's fine with us punters.

I've seen floodlit Pink Ball cricket in The Emirates. For the Red Ball, received wisdom is. Even with the lights on, there is a problem seeing the darkish Red Ball against a dark background. OK. But, what dark background? The sky? The seats? The punters? The grass? We need to be told.

Because one option is to flood whatever is too dark with more light. There, you can have that one for nowt. Of course that'll be expensive and/or impractical. But, again, let's at least know what we're up against.

I would like to see some science chucked at it. A light tunnel affair. Different shades of red/pink. Different luminosity. Some gizmo which measures how clear it would be to the naked eye. Put some metrics on it ffs.

Anyway. All that aside. Simple. You can't control the rain & light. One team has to find a way here.

365/773

Assault on Cracklerock

Yorkshire 281 all out
v Hampshire 222 all out
Yorkshire 69-1
close on Day 2

Thursday 1 September 2016

County Championship Division 1

Played at The Ageas Bowl

Twitter @ball_sup

A neat little close of play trip to the Cracklerock Brewery Tap out in Botley. Just off the main drag. Nice single room affair. Exposed brickwork in an old building. Simple small bar front.

Cider bottles in the fridge. An international lager on keg. And five of their own on handpulls. Lots of bottles for your home drinking & Father's Day (etc) gift requirements.

Bit of banter flying around among small groups of (who I assume to be) locals. The bar bloke was nice & friendly.

I had two beers. Both were OK. Crisp, refreshing, etc. But, if I'm honest, not a great deal going on flavour wise. Underpowered. Both the “Hoppy Pale” & “English Bitter”.

Crackerjack at 3.8%
Barleycorn at 4.2%.

Among the sacks of malts out the back, there were a few enormous sacks of Tate n Lyle refined sugar. Hhhmmm. Methinks.

I suppose this is what it's like when you're duelling point for point with another County (Middlesex) at the top. Every session. Double crucial.

Brooks put a few on at the end with his logoless bat (34 red ink). Then he's taken 5 for 53. As they've gone from 199-4 to 222 all out.

The Hampshire bowlers had the ball jumping all over the place towards the end. Particularly Berg. I suppose that is what it is like.

364/772

Top Middle Rock Bottom

Yorkshire 275-9
v Hampshire
close on Day 1

Wednesday 31 August 2016

County Championship Division 1

Played at The Ageas Bowl

Twitter @ball_sup

Gillespie/Gale Gunslinger Gauge - all the way up to FOUR. Ballance, Brooks, Lehmann & Hodd.

Oh come on. This is getting annoying now. We're at the Business End. Chasing the ThreePeat Championship. Four games to go. Just trailing Middlesex by a few points. And we've got to go to them at Lord's.

Yet. Again. 57-3. Or thereabouts. Lehmann went at 143. Him & Bresnan made fifties. And next highest is/was Brooks. Still unbeaten on 29. That says a lot.

The top & middle are in free fall.

A room bottle of Ridgeway Brewing, Bad King John at 6%.

363/771

Glass Half Full

Hampshire 400-9 declared
v Yorkshire 97-4 declared
Hampshire 0-0 forfeit
Yorkshire 305-5

Yorkshire win by 5 wickets

Thursday 17 September 2015

LV County Championship Division 1
at Southampton

Twitter @ball_sup

The glass half empty part of me thinks Hampshire might have got that wrong. The trade off was the 2 batting & 5 draw points "there for the taking" versus the 16 gambling for the win. I assume the negotiations went fairly smoothly. "Galey, we're 300 & bits ahead, good forecast, 96 overs, tell the out of form Lees, Lyth & Ballance to get their pads on. Unless you want to Pfaff around with the Slide Rule".

Gale is a team man. He hasn't got it in him. But, I'd have been thinking. "They'll go cheaply as per, then out from the dressing rooms a hero will arise". And lo. 125 off 225. Very ably assisted by Leaning (76 off 182). But, no red ink there. Neither of them could just get it over the line.

They were just comfortably ahead to avoid any panic near the end. James Vince knows his business. Maybe he's just factored in the Somerset/Sussex situation & felt they had to push for 16 points. And it looked different when YCCC were 37-3.

Speaking of glass half empty, here's the Beer Report. There is an Atrium Bar behind the Pavilion. Essentially a public bar. On the morning of Day 4, they had Ringwood Best Bitter & Boon Doggle on. Just off that, more in the Pavilion itself, is what I'll call the Members Bar. Not far off being one and the same. Just a bit of rope & a security guy checking passes. And there is a separate bar frontage in the Members. On the morning of Day 4 that also had Ringwood Best Bitter on. And Marston's Pedigree.

Lips were licked. Taste buds were tickled. Hare down at Lunch. Disaster. TinPot. All the Ringwood off in both bars. Only a long queue for the Pedigree remains. But, after that complete collapse, the middle order put a recovery together. By just before Tea, Ringwood Best was back on in the Members. So, I had that at 3.8%.

And, later I toasted Gale's negotiation skills in The Glass Works (Wetherspoons in Islington) on a pint of International Brewers Showcase. By Honza Kocka from Pivovar Kocovnik in Czech Republic. Black Knight on cask at 5%.

A good day.

207/422

Lyth struggling

Hampshire 400-9 declared
v Yorkshire 82-4
close on Day 2

Tuesday 15 September 2015

LV County Championship Division 1
at Southampton

Twitter @ball_sup

A depressing day for Yorkshire. Hampshire looking for the points. Some entertaining biffing & bashing as they chased through 350 to 400. And then, some slow & watchful stuff from YCCC with the bat. Which didn't pay off as they lost wickets. The follow on looks a long way off.

Bad day for Adam Lyth. He was left out of the UAE test squad. Essentially for Hales. And then a two ball Duck. The other absentee, Ballance, limped to 30. Root, Bairstow, Rashid & Plunkett all picked.

I've done another Budvar from a bottle at 5% in the hotel lounge.

205/420

My UAE squad

Hampshire 219-4
v Yorkshire

close on Day 1

Monday 14 September 2015

LV County Championship Division 1
at Southampton

Twitter @ball_sup

So, I've watched that today. But, "not been in the ground". We're staying in the Hilton. The one that includes the Media Centre & sweeps around the Northern end of the ground. Using an off-peak train ticket, I couldn't get here for the start anyway. Some rain around delayed the start. So, I just asked whether my room was ready when I arrived (it was).

It's worked out fine. The room has a balcony. I can watch the game from there. Fine leg to the right hander. Two fairly comfortable "patio chairs" outside. Tea, coffee & a kettle behind me in the room. The game is on Sky. So, I can even dive inside to watch the replays. Bit taters an' all. So, I've been inside to keep warm. (They've been off/on for rain).

There is a very pale strip right next to the very green one they are using. I wondered at first whether they'd just done 2 & chosen this morning. The BBC Radio fellas are saying the pale one is the one used "a while ago" for the ODI. Any road up, they're on the Green 'Un. And, I'm not surprised the Toss Winners have gone for a bowl.

I'm disappointed. A fair few runs & not many wickets. It was a fragmented day. So, a little difficult to put your finger on what went wrong.

Aside from this game, a fair bit going on in wider cricket. Stories that the selecters met for the squad to play Pakistan in the UAE. The openers slot. Alongside Cook. Currently Lyth. Previously Carberry, Root, Compton, Trott, Robson. Next touted cab equals Hales. Or put Moeen in. Allowing you to get Rashid & the seamers in. Right. I cannot see Moeen being a successful opener in South Africa. So, I am against that horse for the UAE course.

I'd go back to Compton.

I'd also be very pragmatic (ie harsh) on the Keeper. Bairstow should be in the side for his runs. He is a keeper. Pushes Buttler out. Sorry. MoneyBall.

Cook, Bell, Anderson, Broad, Stokes, Ali, Root are presumably shoe ins. I'd take Bairstow & Buttler (as cover). I'd take Rashid. I'd take Compton (option to use Ali as cover). The fourth seamer spot has Finn, Wood, Plunkett as front runners. It seems like we've barely seen Plunkett all Summer. I'm going to say take Finn & Wood. Then, as middle order cover. I'm pushing James Taylor ahead of Ballance. That gives me 14.

Plunkett as insurance in a 15, Ballance in a 16. We'll see.

There's not gonna be any real beer hunting here at Southampton. I've done Budvar from a bottle at 5% in the hotel lounge. Few redeeming features.

204/419

Hospital Pass

Yorkshire 370 all out
v Hampshire 227 all out
Yorkshire 305-4 declared
Hampshire 143 all out
Yorkshire win by 305 runs

Wednesday 13 May 2015

Twitter @ball_sup

I can't keep up with the wider world cricket news. Normally I wouldn't Blog my opinions until I'm attending a related match.I'm off to Test Cricket starting next week. So that would be the best time. But, things are moving so fast I might miss my chance. And the story has Yorkshire tones. So here goes.

Colin Graves leaves YCCC to head up the England & Wales Cricket Board (ECB). He mentions there might be/is a way back for Kevin Pietersen. But he must knuckle down & bundle the runs in County Cricket. Pietersen does some jiggery pokery with his lucrative IPL contract. He signs & plays for Surrey "for free".

Meanwhile the Graves New Broom gets rid of the Managing Director (Paul Downton) & Coach (Peter Moores). And appoints former England Captain and famous on-air Pietersen C**t Caller Andrew Strauss.

KP makes 355 in Red Ink for the BrownHatters. Goes for a meeting with C**t Caller Strauss. Words are weaseled. KP is binned.

Hospital pass from Graves to Pietersen.

Hospital pass from Graves to Strauss.

I know what Graves pocket did for Yorkshire. I know he made good strong appointments. He earned the chance (lets have it right, he bought the chance) to treat Yorkshire as his personal fiefdom. I'm far from comfortable with that. It doesn't fit my World View. But he's bought it.

And, he's just carried that personal fiefdom approach into his new ECB role. Including calling the West Indies "mediocre".

Graves is my villain of the piece.

And, lo behold. Pietersen has injured himself in the game for Surrey & might not be able to go to the IPL. Easy to have sympathy for KP. He's "told" he must not go to the IPL & make runs in County Cricket. He does that. But he's been sold lies in a pack. A bloke who called him a c**t on tele gives him a verbal P45. And he's gone in the fetlock & can't earn a living wage in the IPL.

He'll sue the ECB. They'll lump it personally on Graves. He'll have to dip into his personal fortune. He'll pull his money out & YCCC will go bankrupt. And be no more. (All that para is speculation).

Meanwhile on Planet Earth. Rashid has done 8 in the match. Yorkshire have come home by the top side of 300 runs. Maybe Bairstow has batted himself into Pietersen's replacement at Hyderabad in the IPL.

No time for a beer today. Too busy watching the Circus Implode.

137/295

Gillespie or Langer no thanks

Yorkshire 333-7
v Hampshire
close on Day 1

Sunday 10 May 2015

Twitter @ball_sup

So, the big cricket news of the weekend is the appointment of the South African Andrew Strauss as Director of English Cricket. And the speculation that the Australian Jason Gillespie or the Australian Justin Langer will be appointed England Coach. Oh yeah, that all seems a great idea.

I'll wind my neck in a touch. Duncan Fletcher & Andy Flower weren't English. But they did have relative success as Coach. The Colonial complications & the South African upheavals have always meant we've had non-English born, but English qualified, players - like Strauss.

But, I always prefer to rewind. International cricket should showcase one nation's "skills" against another's. There are grey areas, White, Mullally, Hollioake. But, Gillespie & Langer are clear cut, dyed through & through Australians.

I hear you say "but there isn't an English coach good enough, we've got to import an Aussie coach". I always feel - replace the word coach with player. Importing Aussie players because our own aren't good enough would be madness. Nibble away at the Eligibility Rules by all means. Turn a blind eye here. Give a nod there. Maybe for players.

But, Gillespie and Langer are full, card carrying, got the T-shirt, sent the postcard Australians. They're not someone we can claim as our own.

I fear we're in High Profile Celebrity Coach territory. English coaches like Robinson, Newell & Farbrace are well known to us anoraks. But, under the radar of the general public Test Match Cash Cow Punter. "Who" will be the cry. What have they won?

I'd set out what Strauss is going to do. Strategy, selection, motivation, man management, whatever. Decide how hands on he's going to be. And work out the job description for the Coach from there.

Maybe if Strauss is "very hands on". That could make it easier to just give the Coach job to the best qualified English guy. I'd go Strauss & Farbs as the "Dream Ticket".

Dry day today.

Great counter attacking innings by Bairstow. He's in at 109-3. Out for 102 at more or less a run a ball (269-5). I'll tell you what, if Gillespie has been the architect of that. Telling Bairstow to "go out there & counter attack, see if you can take it away from them". Maybe I will chuck my weight behind him.

Plunkett not playing for disciplinary reasons. Lyth solid 53. Poor from Adil. Chipped a catch. Gone for a Duck.

A Big Fat Welcome to Big Boys Cricket to Fidel Edwards. None for 77 off 15.

135/292