1899 The Magic Of The Cup

Millwall 0 v Sheffield United 2 

FA Cup 3rd Round 

Saturday 7 January 2023 

SUFC 2022/23 Game #40 

My name is Phil. I'm a Sheffield United supporter. Although you wouldn't think it from recent Blogs. Of the last 11 games I've been to before today, only 2 (Blackpool & QPR) were BladesDays. With our London soirees coming to an end. With the U21 season (hopefully) restarting on Tuesday. With the National Football Youth League season (hopefully) restarting on Wednesday. It's time to ditch the Oyster Card and get back on the Blades Horse.

We begin at Millwall. With the FA Cup. With a - times have changed point. With a quote from a newspaper published in the hometown of the (then) League Champions. On the eve of their first cup tie of the season. Paraphrased as - the FA Cup is brilliant.

"With five months of the eight in which football holds the sway almost gone, we have once more arrived at the preliminary stages of the English Cup. Somehow or other there is an indescribable attraction about a cup tie which few people can resist, and no matter how badly a team may be doing in the League, success in the Cup at once restores it to the affections of its supporters. Finances, too, improve beyond all expectation, and indeed without the gloriously uncertain elements of a cup tie, the whole game would lose a great deal of its charm."

The quote is from the Sheffield Evening Telegraph, Friday 27 January 1899. Sheffield United were reigning League Champions and would go on to win the FA Cup that year (1899). I paid seven quid English today at Millwall. The Cold Blow Lane End wasn't even open. (Nor was the top tier of the stand on our left). Times have changed. For. The. Worse. 

Rest players because "we won't win the Cup anyway". So that we can get promoted to a league "we can't win anyway". Get to fuck.

Although, we deffo got it right today. We kept an Egan, Norwood, Iliman spine. Had the necessary experienced, seen it all, players splattered around. Had the Big Lads on the bench. And … Basham. Lovely seeing the old dear out there doing what he does. Raiding. Marauding. Arriving. 

A goal after not much more than 20 settled it down a bit. And allowed us to do what we do. Simple to control the game from there. Dan Jeb lively up top. He knocked a few defenders over. Gave away a few "necessary" free kicks. Put the defenders in the fucking game. Zone man at corners an' all.

Sensibe to make subs in the circumstances. Two strikers off for Billy and Berge. Maybe pushing McAtee into a proper ten, with one up. I didn't think that particularly worked. But it didn't matter by then.

And, finally, we had a glimpse at the People Trafficking Project of PRINCE Abdullah bin Musaid Al Saud, the owner of Sheffield United.

"He's a - built his business empire from the factory floor, self made, entrepreneur you know Phil."

"No he's fucking not."

But, let me make myself clear. I am not against the Prince, our current owner. I am against ALL fucking owners. I'm against ownership. Chances are if you're reading this, you're a Blade. Why the fuck would you want someone to own the thing you love? 

"Tolerate 'em - don't rate 'em"

So, in case you missed it, Ismaila Coulibaly came on at 90, to make his Sheffield United debut. Ismaila was signed by Sheffield United with no chance of getting a work permit in Suella Braverman's predecessors Hostile Environment. So, he was trafficked to one of the many other football clubs around the globe owned by the Prince. Effectively earning a Work Permit on the merit of sitting on his arse. (btw he's a victim in all this, not a perp).

But, now the clock's ticking. All Work Permits are time limited. All Work Permits will expire. The Club & Ismaila himself will find it a bit more difficult if he doesn't play 30% of minutes. He won't do that, surely. So this nonsense will just rattle on.

I'm cutting back on including minutiae of my health. I've cut out/cut back on choccies, biccies, sweeties, cakes, ice cream. And, my alcohol units are well under control. I'll know more about the impact at the end of January.

Today, I sank four pints.

"Fuck sake, Phil. That doesn't sound like control"

Well. You say that. But, the drink was in;

Small Beer Brew Co.

70-72 Verney Rd, London SE16 3DH

Which is very close to the New Den. They specialise in lower abv beers. So, those four pints came in at 5.45 units of alcohol. The (just) two pints I had at QPR came it at 5.40.

To brew, you make a porridge, drain off the water, put some hops in and let the yeast turn the sugar to alcohol. I can't speak for Small Beer. But, they built their kit specifically for the lower abv process. I'm suggesting other brewers, producing both normal and low abv beers, put everything through the same kit. Which might not be particularly suited to lower abv.

They'll try & convince you it's magic. But, basically they try to get the initial porridge to churn out (long chain) sugars which the yeast has more difficulty turning into alcohol. So, bad news for us diabetics, less alcohol is likely to mean more sugar.

There's the dilemma right there. A switchback ride around either alcohol or sugar. FFS.

The Original Small Beer IPA at 2.3%

The Original Small Beer Steam (California Common) at 2.7%

The Original Small Beer Lager at 2.1%

And, the best of them, The Original Small Beer Session Pale at 2.5%

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Put Some Liver Back In

Sheffield United 2 v Millwall 0 

The Championship 

Saturday 6 August 2022 

SUFC 2022/23 Game #2 

Will someone tell the F Troop wannabees that actions have consequences. Their incessant opinion that No One Likes them has cost the Carrier Bag Firm a shot at The Cannonball Run today. Or rather, we could have done it, but only in plastic glasses. Which would be much less Gimmicky Fun.

There was lots of a pushing an' a poking, and posturing of the - 

"No, you Fuck Off"

variety all around St Mary's. I even saw two coppers running TOWARDS an altercation. All such shithousery leading to plastic only in the Target Arms. I won't say too much. As, we're obvs going to have another dash at The Cannonball Run. That's a trail, watch this space.

So, the hastily rearranged glass glass drink was in the Industry Tap. Not gonna lie, Washington State, Oregon and the Great British Beer Festival have put some dents in.

Thirty Day average units running up to 40 ish per week. Unsustainable. So, we'll welcome a few one beer games to put some liver back in.

Pomona Island Brew Co. (Salford), Factotum, Pale Ale on Keg at 4%

Straight ahead, bit hazy, pale. It was both exactly what I needed and a touch disappointing. Thin & not a deal going on. Today, inject that into my veins.

Well. That was better. And the first half was even betterer. As per, we started high energy & tempo. Soz, but always seems to fizzle out rather quickly. Ndiaye & Brewster, in particular, started very brightly. But, inevitably, lost energy as the half progressed. Iliman even had the return of the cramperoonies in the second half. 

My Bramall Lane Corner Compadres disagreed, but I liked the look of Norwood in half one. He was very happy to drop very deep and play that Quarter Back role. And, not always looking for the cross field pinging Hollywood ball either. A lot of United's control came from playing accurately between the lines. That'll do it. And, with Iliman and a bulked up Brewster running the patterns, there was a lot of slipping 'em in balls into the box. Did I already say? That'll do it.

Stand out, surely, was right centre back Anel Ahmedhodžić. Very comfortable with the ball at his feet. Not so much overlapping CB, more underlapping Baldock. But, a marauder - we've missed that. And, once the rejuvenated 'wall got it together a bit in half two, Anel & the other defenders had to do the last ditching as well.

I even felt that Anel's movement and Clark's no nonsense solid stuff allowed Egan to play out a bit more. He seemed to be Quarter Backing as much as Norwood at times.

I think there's components. Say what you like about Rhys Norrington-Davies. Maybe he's not always spot on as a defender. Maybe he's not always spot on with his final ball. But, he's stronger and stronger and he puts his body in the right shape & he's very difficult to knock off the ball.

That first goal looked mad from the Bramall Lane Corner. Almost like a worked move for a Foderingham assist. Brewster takes up an odd, advanced position. And as Wes pumps the ball in, Iliman & Rhian are running opposite ways. Rhian basically running interference (it's a foul innit?), so that Iliman can get a clear run on it. Bit lucky with the finish. Another day, the keeper gets on it rather than letting it through him.

That second goal. If you shut your eyes and play it again, you forget that horrendous back pass to no one except himself mistake. It becomes a counter attack goal. I swear Berge actually clears the corner from his back post zone position. And then he just seems to reappear for Fleck's pass. We don't score counter attack goals. 

Rhian's ridiculous wriggling to win the penalty. If that penalty goes in, just a chance we can send a message to the league. But, basically, job done.

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Death In Paradise

Millwall 1 v Sheffield United 0 

The Championship 

Saturday 26 February 2022 

SUFC 2021/22 Game #57 

The page I am on is I've accepted we can't play our best XI Saturday, Tuesday, Saturday. That best XI is missing Basham, McGoldrick & Rhian (and more besides) anyway. This is what management is now for Heckingbottom. It's like an episode of Death In Paradise. He's got a list of game dates on one whiteboard. And a list of players on the other. And he has to find a path through the evidence.

On the Telly, that path is Motive, Opportunity & Means.

Look. Let's have it right. There's a lot said about McBurnie. But, he's one of the suspects on the whiteboard. I've said before, McBurnie's path is get to it (motive), get on it (opportunity) & get it on target (means). A three variable equation he just doesn't solve.

At games, I'm an exclaimer - go on, stay strong, get a shot off - that sort of thing. One involuntary exclaim we all use is - he's missed it!!!

I remember saying that about a McBurnie "chance" in the box. He's missed it!!!

I realised that normally - he's missed it!!! - was exclaimed when a player shot wide, or headed high, or hit the keeper. As in - he's missed the goal - he's missed the target.

But, that particular cross, to McBurnie, he's missed it!!! I realised it was the ball. He's missed the ball!!! That's where we're at.

Oh. And did I mention. I was served a beer out of a piano. Welcome to Bermondsey. That was after the game at;

The Outpost - Three Hills Brewing

7 Almond Rd, London SE16 3LR

A quirky place. I think the core beers are brewed in Kettering. But, there is some kit downstairs which they use for one offs. The bar is down there as well. With the seating upstairs on the mezz. All repurposed, like a dozen front rooms have exploded all at once and bits of the furniture landed here in a Bermondsey arch. 

The printed beer list had twenty beers on. Thirteen of those were poured downstairs from the bar front fonts or the tap wall. Seven were served out of a repurposed piano on the mezzanine floor, where the seats are.

Three Hills Brewing, Baby BPAVK Hazelnut Cappuccino Pastry Stout on Keg at 5.5%

Well. That felt a little out of my comfort zone. But, yeah, what it says. Loads of coffee. Loads of hazelnut. Works well. Sweetness comes late & is "manageable". The Bumph claims Arabica, Robusta, Chari & Catimor coffee varieties (shrugs). Any hazelnut malarkey from the coffee beans was notched up by hazelnut extract.

Three Hills Brewing & Ampersand Brew Co Collab, Smoked Plum Baltic Porter on Keg at 7.5%

Slightly disappointed. I didn't get much of the smoked plums we were promised!! Lovely head spinning beer though. It has actually been cold fermented & lagered. 

Three Hills Brewing, Light Switch, Double New England IPA on Keg at 7.5%

Man. I mean. There was some Gloop on that. I was a little unsure at first. But, it was a grower. Marmalade.

Three Hills Brewing, Heidrun Special Hop Amarillo, Session New England IPA on Keg at 4.5%

Loved that. Nothing harsh. Terry's Choc Orange in the smell. But nice n fresh in the taste. Tizer. Maybe Fanta.

Before the game, we'd visited the more traditional, trestle tables & benches, no pianos, arch at;

Partizan Brewing

34 Raymouth Rd, London SE16 2DB

Partizan have remained minimalist with their beer naming. Basically just the style. Seven on.

Partizan Brewing, Dee Dee, Double Dry Hopped Pale Ale on Keg at 5.5%

Thick n chewy. Hop bitterness builds very slowly. But when it gets there, you know it's arrived. Slightly acidic. But it velvets out into tropical fruit. 

Partizan Brewing Co, West Coast Pale on Keg at 4.8%

I'm giving up on English versions of West Coast Pales. This one was very malty. And doesn't seem to go down taste street at all. Barely taste any hops if I'm honest. Some orange lingering in there.

Partizan Brewing Co, Mosaic, Citra and El Dorado IPA on Keg at 6.5%

Straight into orange opal fruit. Pillowy in the mouth. Not much bitterness. But the fruity hop flavours more than compensate.

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Player 4 Has Entered The Game

Hull City U23 0 v Sheffield United U23 2 

U23 Professional Development League 

Monday 18 October 2021 

Played at (currently) LNER Community Stadium, home of York City 

SUFC 2021/22 Game #18 

Sheffield United 1 v Millwall 2

The Championship 

Tuesday 19 October 2021 

SUFC 2021/22 Game #19 

Big game, big day for the Carrier Bag Firm. York City's "new ground" is the 226th different ground I've seen a Sheffield United XI play on. All levels, all ages, all competitions, all surfaces, all wearing a United kit, all with a badge on. (Also happens to be the 376th different ground I've visited for football).

One of the CBF Luminaries took a week off work to have a North Yorkshire holiday based around this fixture. Without realising the Millwall game was the day after & he'd miss that. York's new ground is on an out of town shopping & leisure complex. Two of the CBF Infantry decided to travel to the ground from York on those Council Electric Scooters that are doing the rounds in some Cities. Thing is, the ground is outside the range of those in York. Embedded GPS makes them cut out if you try to cross the zone border with them. They had to ride 'em back into Dodge, dump them at a charging station & walk the rest of the way. At least they got there before half time!!!!

I repeat Big Game, Big Day for the Carrier Bag Firm.

I quite like the new ground. It felt very much fit for purpose. Comfortable padded seats - I got (correctly) told off by a Steward for putting my feet on the seat in front. Plenty of space. Great sight lines.

The playing surface looked absolutely state of the art. One of those hard wearing grass & synthetic hybrids. As well as York City, there are regular games for BOTH Hull City & Leeds United Academy teams AND Rugby League.

Of course, it wouldn't be an SUFC Academy game without the inevitable shenanigans around getting in. From our Bus Stop, we did nearly a full lap of the ground looking for the relevant gate. That included a section in & out of the attached leisure centre. Eventually we saw two hi vizzers guarding a way in.

There was a guy in a suit in front of us. Here we go….

"Hello, can I help you?"

"Yes, I'm the Sheffield United team Coach Driver"

"And how can I help you?"

"I've parked the coach up where they've told me & now I'd like to watch the game please"

"Will your name be on our list?"

"Dunno, I'm the Coach Driver"

El High Viz closely inspects list. Is he looking under D for Driver? Or C for Coach? Fuck knows. (Oh & the confusion means there are two of them now.) The collective decision is reached & communicated.

"I think it'll be best if you just go through the spectators gate"

Player 4, me, now enters the game

"Hi mate, we're here as fans, we'll also need to go to the spectators gate, where is it please?"

"Sorry, I don't know"

(Insert Giggling here)

"I think it might be Gate 15"

"Super, where is that?"

"I don't really know, maybe that way, no possibly that way, er, not sure"

The Coach Driver & the Carrier Bag Firm turn left and enter the ground maybe 40 yards away through Gate Fucking THREE.

Quite an odd game that one. United were always comfortable, but never dominating. The second, clinching, goal didn't come until the 83rd minute. I thought the starting two up top, Cappello & Antwoine Hackford offered very little. Hackford lasted until 67, replaced by Ayari. Ange Cappello has been used as left wing back in some recent U23 games. But tonight, returned to the attacking role we've seen in him throughout his earlier career.

The midfield four was stuffed with the pocket rockets. On the way home, we tried to think of the last big tall midfield enforcer we've had in the U23 team. And we struggled, who the fuck is that guy?

Arblaster, Maguire, Slater & Brunt

Maguire was brought down for the Penalty scored by Brunt. & Regan bagged that clincher on 83. All four were influential & busy all night.

It was all very flexible. Although I felt Slater was in a more attacking role than we'd seen him previously. Maybe, maybe, in EFL football he'll eventually make his way as the holding central midfield player he's down as. But, tonight, it was great to see him unleashed a bit. Ayari found him with a great ball to the left hand corner of the box, he brought it neatly onto his right foot & curled it past the keeper.

Towards the end of the first half, Frankie Maguire had been fouled in the box on the right. Brunt took a no nonsense, smash it past the keeper approach to give us the lead.

And, I'll say about Oliver Arblaster, he didn't look different to the more experienced and older three alongside him. He had that same livewire thing going on and I was impressed by him.

Back four tonight. Starbuck on the right. (Incidentally, he had a quieter game than of late.) Gordon & Lopata in the middle. And Nicksoen Gomis as a conventional (fucking tall, but conventional) left back. Thing is. The Tiger Cubs were no threat for a lot of the game. And Nix couldn't help himself. Particularly later on. Marauding forward down the left & into the channels like a good 'un.

I love seeing players play "out of position" sometimes. You can tell a lot about a player in those circumstances. Obvs, he had it a bit easy. But, it was a joy to watch Gomis getting it on tonight.

United often tried to find Lopata at dead balls. Occasionally, he was a decoy to get Ky Gordon on it. Ky hit the post as early as the 8th after arriving late on a worked corner.

Otherwise, the defence was very organised & comfortable. Dealing with & tidying up everything.

That result leaves us second in the table. A point behind leaders Coventry. And a four point gap to Peterborough.

The Maltings

Tanner's Moat, York YO1 6HU

Was very busy with lunch time lunchers.

Treboom Brewery, Yorkshire Sparkle, Citrus Pale Ale on Cask at 4%

Lemon washing up liquid citrus. Very pale. Nice & drinkable as you get down it.

The Ackhorne

9 St Martin's Ln, York YO1 6LR

Proper fraying at the edges side street boozer.

Ainsty Ales, Cool Citra on Cask at 4.4%.

I thought that was very good. Although the hop bitterness is not intense, it certainly kept on coming.

The Market Cat

6 Jubbergate, York YO1 8RT

Modern, slightly up market bar on three floors. Of course we didn't know it had seating on three floors until we had to climb them for a piss. And, it's essentially a Thornbridge pub.

Atom, Echo Chamber, West Coast Pale on Cask at 5.5%

Decent enough. But underpowered in all the key West Coast areas.

The Three Legged Mare

15 High Petergate, York YO1 7EN

My favourite pub of the four. Simple & modern with a large bar front.

Bad Seed Brewery, Game Plan, Ekuanot Pale on Cask at 4.2%

Lovely beer, with a hint of spiciness in the rear.

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Realign those wheels

Birmingham City 1 v Sheffield United 1
The Championship
Wednesday 10 April 2019

Sheffield United 1 v Millwall 1
The Championship
Saturday 13 April 2019

SUFC 2018/19 Games 81 & 82
2018/19 Football Season Brewery Visits - 103

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Two one alls there. Going into that lot, that's probably not what you wanted. United were ahead in both games. But, basically, both Birmingham & Millwall always looked like they'd have an equaliser in them. The wheels looked like they needed to go in for realignment after the Millwall game. Basham off with a hamstring. To be replaced by Madine. Centre Back off, Striker on. Sharp off with a hamstring. To be replaced by Cranie. Striker off, Centre Back on. Egan red card for handling on the line. Penalty missed. And, still time for Millwall's 90+5 equaliser. And, and, and, still time for Wilder to fill the swear box in front of the ref. Apparently all about a foul on McGoldrick in the build up to the build up to the ball being with Millwall's keeper in the build up to the build up to the equaliser.

I'll continue to stick to the plan. All teams play 46. Add up the points. But, what I will say is. Marvelous season. Played some great stuff. It's all still in our hands. What the fuck is all this “might as well write the Play Offs off” nonsense about? Three draws in the Play Offs & win the Penalty lotteries & we're up. It's in our hands. Win games. Draw games. Score some penalties. Don't worry about Leeds.

The midweek drink was in (what I understand is) a new bar in Sutton Coldfield. Cask and Craft on Boldmere Road. That was an easy place to warm to. Very simple & modern design. Beers lined up on the wall behind him. I recall it along the lines of six keg, one cask. I had the;

Northern Monk, Patrons Project 3.07 // James Butler // Golden Whale // GlassHouse // BOXCAR // DDH IPA on keg at 7.4%.

Or as we know it the Surely Name Too Long. It was just a little disappointing after the build up. There was a nice tropical sweetness. But not a lot happening after that. It definitely needed some more bitter ooommmppphhh.

Before the Millwall game, I had a glass of Latest Gimmick Beer.

Northern Monk, Henderson's Relish // Bloody Mary Porter on keg at 5%. 

Mainly a) I'd struggle to say I could taste the Hendo's & b) the chilli heat was a bit too much for me. It's deffo a Gimmick Beer. But, all told, not that bad a gimmick.

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Blades AnAleyTicks

Millwall 2 v Sheffield United 3
The Championship
Saturday 29 September 2018

Sheffield United 3 v Preston North End 2
The Championship
Saturday 22 September 2018

Sheffield United 0 v Birmingham City 0
The Championship
Wednesday 9 September 2018

Yorkshire 184 all out
v Hampshire 79 for 5
close on Day 1
County Championship Division One
Tuesday 18 September 2018
Played at Headingley

SUFC 2018/19 Games 25, 26 & 27

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Lots of people are at it now. At last. Numbers. Statistics. Expected this that other Models. One of my jobs before the Carrier Bag Firm became a profitable going concern involved me calculating the Inflation Price Index for Tristan da Cunha. A remote group of islands in the South Atlantic. You'll hear lots of rhetoric about how official statistics are fixed. Made up even. But, come on, you might not know me from Eve. But who would you really want to be in charge of Retail Price Indices for a South Atlantic Archipelago. Free choice. If ever a job was made for the Carrier Bag Firm, that is it. Hand. In. Glove.

I'm a numbers guy. Everyone's getting an angle. I need one. Welcome to the trial edition of Blades AnAleyTicks. Mate, you've been Punned.

Millwall away. A Saturday. I've looked at the expectations. I've looked at the reality. Poor performance that. Many of the worst aspects of our recent seasons.

The Plan. I collated the Scouting Reports. The maximum number of expected Breweries on the day was EIGHTEEN. Brockley Brewing Co was the last target. But, that closes at 9pm. So, that always looked unlikely. Fourpure Brewing Co is effectively under South Bermondsey station. Opens 11am to 8pm. Under normal circumstances that's very very doable. But, we had to run & re-run the model and check the parameters. Fucking 100% owned by Australian Beverage Bollocks Co, Lion. In turn owned by Kirin. Big. Fucking. Beer. We had 16 others to go at. Big Beer can go to the end of the list. File under - gratuitous pisstake sneer at them Brewery Tick.

That revised our xBT (expected Brewery Ticks) to SIXTEEN. Our actual, final total was a Piss Poor ELEVEN. Just 69% Completion Rate.

What went wrong. Team selection was partly to blame. Two bona fide Carrier Baggers. Plus Two Fellow Travellers on a One Match Trial. One FT can only drink pints. Doesn't like low abv beers. Doesn't like high abv beers. Really only likes dark beers. Finds hopped beers sour (FFS - Amateur Hour). He won't have Tasters. It's beneath him. His eyesight is too poor to read the Beer Blackboards. He can sometimes read pump clips if he gets four inches away from them & squints. And, he won't wear glasses.  So, he'll routinely end up with a beer he didn't ask for & he doesn't really like. He also has very poor BM (Bladder Management). On a run which will often involve portaloos or single, unisex traps.

Because this is a full on AnAleyTicks Blog, it helps to categorise events & personnel. He is a Fucking Liability.

How good was the Plan. Everyone has a plan, until they get punched in the mouth. (Quote attributed to Mike Tyson). The first punch was at Anspach & Hobday. The Scouting Report said open at 1030. The sign on the door said 1100. The locked shutters effectively confirmed that. We Recalibrated. The sign on the door at Southwark Brewing also said 1100. But, the second punch in the mouth came fast. Boooom. The staff arrived to open Southwark Brewing up. But, with a big bunch of apparently random keys. And a raft of locks, bolts, padlocks to keep the Bad South Londonarians out. They could not open the doors. (This Blog now pauses while I go for a lie down in a darkened room).

We were told The Florence in Herne Hill no longer had what you would call a recognisable Brew Kit. And. Nail. Coffin. I'd already ordered the beers in Brick Brewery, Peckham Rye before I had a quick shufty at the geography. A quick word with the bar person confirmed. It's not actually a Brewery. When you're Brewery Ticking, that's usually a requirement.

The Positives. Many. We were patient at times. Wait. Wait. Wait. Build again. Aaahhh. They've found the square key for the square lock at Southwark Brewing. And ….. we're in.

We adapted very well in running, as the ticking progressed. Shit. The Florence is not a Brewery any more. Don't worry, we hadn't realised Bullfinch was so close until we spoke to the Brewer at Clarkshaws. Nix The Florence. Hit Bullfinch.

We hit a wall at Gipsy Hill Brewing. That, plus Southey Brewing in Penge would have put us on THIRTEEN. It was already Too Late For Brockley (note to self - possible name for South London musical, something, something, something, Too Late For Brockley, the Songs Of Squeeze - needs work).

The Blackboards at Gipsy Hill were very difficult for any of us to read. I ordered Beatnik. That was off. The female bar person walked away to talk to someone at the end of the bar. The male bar person was engrossed with his phone. Maybe five feet away from me. No amount of “excuse mes” got me anywhere. I was Eleven Breweries in. The clock was ticking. He got the full - OY - treatment. Wouldn't serve us. We needed to wait for his female colleague. While he did Fuck All. I thought, well if he's getting his Social Media in order, so will I. I made to take a picture of the Beer Blackboards for Twitter, Instagram & Untappd. Both of them suddenly got the idea I was taking pictures of them. That should not be a problem anyway. It's 2018 Daddio. I thrust my phone at them offering them a look at the Gallery. Full of pictures of Beer Boards. Empty of pictures of them. They wouldn't have it. And we were asked to leave the broadly empty gaff. Without having a drink. I minced out like a good 'un.

Gipsy Hill can happily have the piss poor, unwelcoming Brewery Tap experience award. I will mention them in my acceptance speech at next year's Beer Geek Awards.

The Best Brewery Of The Day can go to Brew By Nos.

I'm not awarding an Outstanding Beer Of The Day. When you're plotting 18 Breweries, believe me abv matters. I'm awarding a Genre Of The Day & shouting out to all those superb low abv Pales & IPAs. No compromise on flavour.

The Kernel, Table Beer at 2.9%
Southwark Brewing Co, All Day Breakfast at 3.4%
Brew By Nos, 27 01 Double Dry Hopped Table Pale, Eldorado & Citra at 3.5%
Bianca Road, Long Play IPA at 3.6%
Canopy Beer Co, Love Walks Small at 2.9%
Bullfinch, Juno (Amarillo) at 2.8%

Looking at those abvs, it's a surprise we were so hammered that they wouldn't serve us in Gipsy Hill Brewing. (note - we weren't)

Let the record show. 18 in the plan. One off as wouldn't be reached in time. One off as now Big Industrial Chemical Plant Beer. One no longer brewing. One just a bar, not a Brewery. Two nixed in timetable shake up. One added opportunistically. Binned out of one (snigger). One just a Brewery too far.

The Kernel (off sales only - took the cap off & drank it walking to the next one - we are savages), Southwark Brewing, Anspach & Hobday, Brew By Nos, Bianca Road Brew Co, Affinity Brew Co, Spartan Brewery, Partizan Brewing, Clarkshaws Brewing, Canopy Beer Co, Bullfinch Brewery. The First XI.

722/1502

Nozzer from Lewisham

Sheffield United 1 v Millwall 1
The Championship

Saturday 14 April 2018

SUFC 2017/18 Game 82

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I left feeling frustrated. We kept at it. We kept in it. We sort of did the hard work. We finally bundled one home. Only to concede the equaliser almost immediately. Both keepers made superb saves. When the dust settles. That leaves us ninth. With just three to play. It looks a long long way from here. Not many - still in with a shout games left.

I feel that, on paper, Clarke & Brooks is our best starting option up top. But for much of the first half, they could not get into the game. We know that Brooks can hurt teams. So, you've got to find a pattern that gets him involved, often. I'm not saying it's his fault. But, he had to take some responsibility & get in it, somehow.

Also. Duffy. He gives you the best attacking midfield option. By far. In must wins, he's a must. Anyway. The tape is in sight.

Look. I like a bit of Bollocks in the ground. Nothing violent mind. Boisterous. Exuberant. Is where we're pitching it. But, the Security Operation Utd run - it's piss poor isn't it. Away fans can get over the perimeter at will. Impunity - that's with 'em. We've got a big fuck off stand. And, the top tier are only allowed down one set of stairs & out of one door. I know that's not how it would be in an emergency. But, funneling people away from exits to a smaller number of exits. I'm surprised that's allowed.

A red flare got tossed from the front couple of rows of the Bramall Lane Upper. I saw it come out of someone's hand. But, I was too far back to see exactly. It caught in the net above the Gentrified Bermondsonians. So, no real harm done. But, the full force of the Security Operation kicked in. As stewards, both far too young & far too old, ambled aimlessly in the general direction. With no real purpose nor intent. Hoping, desperately, that they'd have to do nothing if & when they got near the problem.  Meanwhile. Many Other Stewards, nowhere near the action …. point.

It's sort of Peak Security now. They've got so many different things in place - but there's still Bollocks. Roads closed. Metal barriers. Police cordons. Stewards with colour coded coats. And improbable job descriptions written on the back. Incident Control Team. No one out of that exit. Must turn left. Must turn right. Stay in your seats. Inaudible announcements of nonsensical instructions. Sniffer dogs. Pat down searches. The Police Chopper. All no avail. Nozzer from Lewisham can jump the barrier, push past a steward, cavort, turn around, & mince back to his seat. Fuck me, we didn't see that one coming.

Big Beer Day.
The Portland House.
The Ecclesall Ale Club.
The Rising Sun.
I'll not list.
I'll give Standout Beer Of The Day to;
Burning Sky Brewery, Pretty Mess IPA at 7% (Ale Club)

643/1334